"Do these glasses make me look cool?"

Even by the standards of any White House needing to say something that doesn't venture into "That Statements is No Longer Operative" territory (it's hell getting old, and seeing history repeat itself as farce), this is a laughable assertion:

“The president has had an incredibly successful trip overseas and the White House looks forward to continuing an aggressive messaging strategy to highlight his agenda when we return to D.C.,” said White House spokeswoman Sarah Sanders.

So, what was incredibly successful?  Curtsying to the King of Saudi Arabia?  Placing hands on a glowing orb?  Getting slapped away by Melania once, and given the fake-out the next time?  The handshake with President Marcon?  Pushing to the front of the room at NATO?  Insulting and berating NATO and refusing to the the minimum of pledging fealty to Article 5 of the treaty (which has only been invoked once, in support of the U.S.  Thanks for nothin', Europe!  Suckers!!)?  This was the trip so bad Andrea Mitchell said the NATO speech was "painful to watch."  Andrea Mitchell, the wife of Alan Greenspan!!

Or maybe it's that Trump hasn't been on Twitter while he hasn't been in the country:

“It’s a seemingly impossible task,” one senior administration official said. “A disproportionate amount of our time has been spent reacting to ill-advised tweets.”

There's a solution for that!

The Wall Street Journal is reporting that attorneys want to monitor Trump’s Twitter account and vet the tweets before they’re sent out to a broad audience.

Hell, even CNN is laughing at you:

“Is one of those lawyers going to take up residence in the White House residence?” CNN’s Dana Bash asked Wolf Blitzer. “That is the biggest issue for the White House staff is tearing their hair out looking at these tweets.”

She noted that Trump’s tweets don’t come during typical working hours they come from the early and late hours when Trump is glued to cable news and tweeting from his phone. She also noted that it is in profound contrast to Trump’s renewed advisor Corey Lewandowsky, who operated under the “let Trump be Trump” policy.

Yahoo’s Brianna Golodryga wondered how it’s possible Trump has signed off on the new policy because it’s so contrary to his typical way of operating.

“All of this goes back on whether the president will sign off on this and I don’t see that happening,” she said. “I mean, what, are these lawyers going to come in at 2:00 a.m. for phone duty?”

Former CIA staffer turned CNN commentator Phil Mudd rattled off scandal after scandal wondering how this is decided as the solution.

“We’re 120 days in, now we’re hearing things like controlling his tweets,” Mudd said. “I hope not, actually, because I need Comedy Central, to this issue of whether we shake up the White House staff to control a president that is 70-years-old and has proven, not for a moment, that he’s maturing from day one. I don’t buy it.”

Mudd said that he didn’t buy that “a 70-year-old will have to change over 120 days.” he continued. “Give me one ounce of evidence other than he’s been quiet on the European tour and he might be quiet on Twitter. I don’t buy it.”

The calls are coming from inside the house!

Those two high-ranking officials will oversee [the war room's] general strategy, but other senior communications staffers — including Cliff Sims, director of White House message strategy, and Andrew Surabian, deputy policy strategist — will manage day-to-day operations.

Surbian is one of Bannon’s closest aides and former political director of the Tea Party Express.

Sims, who previously ran the Alabama politics site Yellowhammer News, was identified by The Daily Beast as the staffer who suggested that former President Barack Obama had wiretapped Trump Tower.

Their backgrounds suggest the White House will present the “deep state” and partisan media as enemies trying to bring down the Trump presidency in an effort to deflect attention from the investigation of alleged collusion between the Trump campaign and Russia.

I think you're gonna need a bigger war room.  Because you can't overlook this detail:

Trump’s son-in-law, Jared Kushner — who himself is a target of the probe — is helping Bannon and Priebus set up the war room.

Yup, Jared Kushner, a man described this way:

“We’re talking about a guy who isn’t particularly bright or hard-working, doesn’t actually know anything, has bought his way into everything ever (with money he got from his criminal father), who is deeply insecure and obsessed with fame (you don’t buy the NYO, marry Ivanka Trump, or constantly talk about the phone calls you get from celebrities if it’s in your nature to ‘shun the spotlight’), and who is basically a shithead.”

The man who is widely believed to be the "person of interest" in the White House, who has his own connections to Russia and Flynn? 

Yeah, this is gonna work.

Adding:  Apparently Kushner approached the Russian ambassador to "set up a 'secure communications channel' in a 'Russian diplomatic facility,' which would allow the Trump team to have an open and private channel to the Kremlin.  This is extremely clever not only because it would compromise Russian security, but because:

“the FBI closely monitors the communications of Russian officials in the United States, and maintains near-constant surveillance of its diplomatic facilities. The National Security Agency monitors the communications of Russian officials overseas.”

So, yeah, Kushner is part of the sooper-genius team that's gonna save Trump from himself.  If this wasn't so serious, I'd be demanding the popcorn.

This will not end well.