Monday, May 22, 2023

If Your Identity Is Not Congruent With My Identity, You Are The Problem

Where "you" is anyone from another parent at my child's school, to the federal government.

“So what I feel like you’re strongly implying, and I would like to get your take on because I don’t want to attribute something that you don’t think like, to me it sounds like you’re saying there’s some kind of high-level coordinated effort to make more children trans and gay.”

Before should could finish her sentence Schoening interrupted, saying, “There is.”

“Yep,” she added.

“Well who’s directing that?” Reeve asked.

“Teachers’ unions and, um, our president’s, and a lot of funding sources, and teachers’ unions are also heavily backing the curriculum that we’re bringing into school.”

Reeve asked why teachers’ unions and President Biden would want more kids be gay and trans.

Schoening didn’t waste a moment.

“Because it breaks down the family unit, which breaks down traditional conservative values, it breaks down a lot of things in this country,” Schoening replied.

“It breaks down a lot of things in this country,” Schoening continued. “It changes the way that people think, it changes the way that people, um, handle politics.”

Back in the interview, Reeve tells Schoening, “When I hear those thoughts about, like, some sort of concerted effort to make people gay, does it sound like a conspiracy theory?”

“Um,” Schoening insists, “It’s not a conspiracy theory that the state – whether you’re talking about Colorado or the federal government – is taking a stronger hand in public education, in raising our kids.”

She says it’s a “mischaracterization” that she thinks “people want everyone to be gay.”

“The people that want to erode away at parental rights, the left, the teachers’ unions, they’ll use LGBTQ or whatever may be the case at the time – those are just tools to erode away at parental rights.”

Right. Nothing lunatic here.  Just a shadowy group of "them" who are trying to take over the world by "erod[ing] away at parental rights."  Whatever "parental rights" are.  And whoever "they" are.

The fundamental problem is that Schoening's identity is challenged by people who don't think the way she does.  So she must protect her identity from their intrusion.  This is one of the more extreme ways people do that.  Most of us just shrug and grumble that "nowt so queer as folk" and move on, associating with people who disturb or annoy us as little as possible, and grouping with people of more similar interests.  Schoening can't do that, nor face the responsibility for her actions/beliefs, so she blames "them" for what she "must" do.

She's actually the hero of her own action movie.  She's saving the country, and so saving the world.  A world that isn't her, nor an extension of her (something most children learn and live with about the time they go to first grade), and so can't ever by saved by her. But she is discardinig those people (who threaten her identity) and erecting thicker barriers in order to protect her identity.  

Which is a never ending job that just makes her identity ever more fragile.  And makes her a problem for the rest of us, who really just want to get along.  Sometimes everything you need to know you really did learn in kindergarten.  But not all of us learn even those basic lessons about society and individuality, and self and self-interests. 

And if there is a conflict between your opinions/beliefs and the world's, the solution is to teach your children your opinions/beliefs, not to tell the world to change:

Because, surprise, surprise! Children are people, too. Parents rights are broad, but they are not absolute.

The article says books were removed from shelves because parents complained; but it doesn't say how many parents complained, or what they specifically complained about.  The better recourse is for parents to examine what their kids are reading (although if they are reading books at all it's a good sign) rather than remove those books from access by all students and parents.  You want to send your kid to school in a hazmat suit: fine.  But you can't insist the school be a germ free zone with all facilities absolutely sterilized to prevent risk of contagion to your child.

Other people have rights, too.  Which is what people like Schoening don't understand; their fragile sense of identity won't let them.
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1 comment:

  1. rustypickup3:59 PM

    The latest "Parent's Bill of Rights" has thankfully been killed in the New Hampshire house by a very narrow margin. Most of the bill was just repition of already existing rights, for example the schools already couldn't vaccinate your children without permission. Of course the real reason for the bill was to LGBTQ+ students. The schools would have to report to parents if your kids used different pronouns form their gender at birth and more. As one guidance counselor testified, the language would have required them to keep records of every girl that danced with another at the school dance, or hugged each other in the hall. A similar bill last year passed when the Republicans had larger majorities but was vetoed by Sununu. This year Sununu has visions of running for president, he needs to polish his conservative bona-fides so he said he would sign it this time. The state senate passed it 14 to 10 on a strict partisan vote (democrats got more votes the last election but with gerrymandering they only got 10 seats). By 16 votes the reporting requirement was stripped from the bill, and even better by six votes the bill was tabled in a way so that this bill or a similar bill can't be brought up for two years. Hopefully the anti trans and and more general anti LGBTQ+ fever will have lifted by then.

    I agree with your comment that the conservatives can't see that others have rights , including the right to be left alone. And as an addition they can't see their own children as having rights separate from their parents. They want absolute control over their children and my child. Pregnant women can't have agency, LGBTQ+ adults and children can't have agency, and their own children can't have agency to think and be any different from their parents. There is a fragility and fear in these positions, like the fragility and fear that drives one to feel the need to carry a firearm everywhere.

    This weekend we were finally were able to have a service of remembrance for my mother in law who passed in December. It was the traditional Lutheran ELVA service with communion and sermon. My son read psalm 23, including that moving line;

    Even though I walk
    through the darkest valley,[a]
    I will fear no evil,
    for you are with me;
    your rod and your staff,
    they comfort me.

    The pastor's sermon referenced this line, and talked of our fears and god's place in our lives. My own fear's can create what I perceive as more darkness. But it's not real, and even when it is real god has made a promise. These Mom's for Liberty, the conservative state senators and house members (the head of the house had an angry outburst when the bill failed) are turning children into their own darkness. I don't know how you even reach them, this isn't even anymore about a particular issue, but about a state of fear and finding more to fear.

    Dear god, relieve me of my fears. Stop me from finding more to fear.

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