Sunday, April 12, 2026

Dumbest Sonofabitch On The Planet

Trump on the phone with Maria Bartiromo: "We don't get our oil from there. We have so much oil. We have boats pouring up to the United States. They'll be filling 'em up, and they'll be leaving and they'll be packed with the best oil you can get. Light, sweet, crude. We don't need the strait."
WILL SOMEONE PLEASE TAKE THIS IDIOT’S TOYS AWAY? HAS THE WORLD SAID “THANK YOU”?
Trump: "We're putting on a complete blockade. We're not gonna let Iran make money on selling oil to people that they like and not people that they don't like. It's gonna be all or none, and that's the way it is. You saw what we did with Venezuela. It'll be something similar to that, but at a higher level."
His frame of reference is still Venezuela. He has no clue what’s going on. And yet they sent your team home AFTER ONE DAY!  THAT’S NOT HOW THIS WORKS! THAT’S NOT HOW ANY OF THIS WORKS! Funny, it didn’t keep them at the table. THEY TOOK OUT A HELICOPTER AND TWO JETS!  AND FORCED US TO ABANDON A FORWARD AIRBASE AND DESTROY TWO MORE PLANES AND ANOTHER HELICOPTER! WHERE THE FUCK ARE YOU GETTING YOUR INFORMATION?  NEWSMAX? "IT IS MOST UNLIKELY.” Maybe you should shake that Magic 8-ball a little harder.
Trump: "I could take out Iran in one day. In one hour, I could have their entire energy, everything, every one of their electric generating plants, which is a big deal. I hate to do it because if I do it, it takes you 10 years to rebuild. They'll never be able to. And the other thing you take out are their bridges. I took out one just to show them."
Last week you said it would take 4 hours. Now it’s down to 1 hour. And yet you said: So we’re going to bounce the rubble? “Who da fuck knows? Who da fuck cares? Know wut I’m sayin’?”
Trump: "I hear news reports about China giving the shoulder missiles. I doubt they would do that because I have a relationship and I think they wouldn't do that, but maybe they did a little bit at the beginning, but I don't think they would anymore. But if we catch them doing that they get a 50% tariff."
Those “news reports” are based on information from U.S. intelligence agencies! Where the fuck does he get his information? Twitter?!?

And if China is selling missiles to Iran, the way to fix it is to punish U.S. consumers? A bag of rocks is smarter.
The slightly silver lining.

A chimpanzee could fool Trump. In order to save Lebanon, Israel had to destroy it. Petulance is not really a winning foreign or economic policy. But it is a great way to burn the world down. Europe learned that in the 20th century. Israel shouldn’t even be allowed at the adults’ table right now. Did I wake up in an alternate reality? Pretty sure it started when Trump backed out of the JCPOA, and Congress clapped like trained seals. Now Iran is “obliterated,” but we have to destroy them in an hour because they closed the Strait that we’ve now closed because NOBODY PUTS BABY IN THE CORNER! Except…Baby?

And we’re going to hit ourselves in the face if China is selling missiles to Iran. But it’s okay if Russia is giving Iran targeting information.

Everything stopped making sense in November, 2024.
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1 comment:

  1. jim, some guy in iowa12:35 PM

    Ten years of sane-washing and smart-washing the guy and Bartiromo is just starting to realize it's isn't just *us* trapped in a small room with Trump, but so is *she*.

    ReplyDelete

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