The REAL Cheesecake Factory*

Trump: This is my 26th rally in about 12 days. https://t.co/9lAccTNuvZ

— Acyn (@Acyn) October 25, 2026

"Hi, welcome to The Cheesecake Factory! How many are in your party?” https://t.co/NjuY5lkRRS

— derek guy (@dieworkwear) October 25, 2026

More than five million Americans have lost their SNAP benefits due to Trump's "Big Beautiful Bill," which has forced many, including US veterans, to go to food banks. https://t.co/89wvjJU4GK

— derek guy (@dieworkwear) October 25, 2026

You're right that this is a nice meal for some. In 2024, a rib-eye steak at the Wichita, Kansas location cost $38.95 (5 hours and 22 mins of work on min wage). After Trump's trade wars and Iran war, that same meal now costs $43.95, adding nearly an extra hour of work on that wage https://t.co/BfrqCiWpie

— derek guy (@dieworkwear) October 25, 2026

*you're

— derek guy (@dieworkwear) October 25, 2026

"the white house should look like the place where i order asian chicken nachos because otherwise how will working-class americans know they're respected." listen to yourself.

— derek guy (@dieworkwear) October 25, 2026

(Trump lives at his own resort, and has probably never been in a Cheesecake Factory in his life. And I notice nobody is picking up the Saddam Hussein side of Obama’s comment.)

Obama in Michigan: "He is focused on home renovations. He should be on HGTV! ... He's got the White House looking like Saddam Hussein opened a Cheesecake Factory" https://t.co/XSulq5sh8f

— Aaron Rupar (@atrupar) October 24, 2026

American conservatives are constantly bemoaning the decline of aesthetic standards and calling for a return to classical Roman architecture, but are now forced to defend the Cheesecake Factory. A constant tension between the Brooks Brothers patrician and the Kid Rock populist.

— derek guy (@dieworkwear) October 25, 2026

*Full disclosure: I have never been to a Cheesecake Factory, so I don’t have a dog in this fight. If I did have a dog, I’d just wonder why I didn’t get another cat.

next president should redecorate the white house like rainforest cafe https://t.co/JvuJUtUIid

— derek guy (@dieworkwear) October 25, 2026

I have been to a Rainforest Cafe. Once. For my daughter, when she was young enough to enjoy it. Never again. Way too expensive. And crappy food.