I Go Out For Few Hours…

 …and everybody goes crazy!😜 

amazing - during a Fox News interview w/ Brian Kilmeade, former president of Ukraine Petro Poroshenko denounces Victor Shokin, who plays as a leading role in Kilmeade's conspiracy theories, as a "completely crazy person" & says "there's something wrong with him" as Kilmeade melts

Something like this:

KILMEADE: Shokin didn't get fired because of Joe Biden? 

POROSHENKO: He was fired because of his own statement 

KILMEADE: Alright. Mr President, thanks so much.

I’m pretty sure Hunter got to Poroshenko and bought him off with China money.

Then Trump gave a speech:

Trump: When I come here, everyone thought Bush was going to win… They thought Bush because he was supposedly a military person. He got us into the Middle East

Okay, so...

A) No idea where “here” is.

B) Shrub? Poppy? Jeb!? Trump ran against one of them. The other two got us into the Middle East, and back into the Middle East. Which we’ve been “in” since before the establishment of Israel. 

C) Only Poppy could be vaguely described as a “military person,” Because he was a pilot in WWII. Shrub famously avoided service. So, again: who the hell?

D) “Mom!! Grandpa needs his meds again!”

And then (or before? Does the timeline matter?), Trump went to a gun shop in SC.  Where he was presented with a gun that had his face carved into the handle. And Trump said, twice: “I want to buy this gun.”

His campaign dutifully reported that he had done so.  Until a few minutes later, when Xitter reported that would be a violation of federal law, as Trump is under (multiple) felony indictment(s). At which point the video of Trump slobbering over the gun, offered as proof of his 2nd amendment bona fides, was deleted, and the purchase of the gun staunchly denied.

Except MTG, noted legal scholar and Trump fanboi #1!👆, said she was there and he DID buy it!

18 U.S.C. § 922(d)(1) makes it a federal crime to sell a firearm to a person who is under felony indictment. 

And 18 U.S.C. § 922(n) makes it a federal crime for a person under indictment to ship or transport a firearm.

We’re waiting to see what Jack Smith thinks.

But Trump wasn’t through with his speech:

Trump in South Carolina claims that Biden is "trying to bludgeon the boating and maritime industry ... with a speed limit of less than 11 miles an hour." He then says the real whale killers are "windmills." 

"They're driving the whales a little batty," Trump adds.

Whales 🐳 are jumping into windmills? Speed limits in boats? The Coast Guard is getting radar guns?

When do we stop talking about Biden’s age, and start talking about Trump’s lost marbles?