Tuesday, February 06, 2007

Just when you thought it was safe

If I am reading this right:

There were three resolutions in play today. The Warner-Levin anti-surge resolution. The McCain-Graham-Lieberman pro-surge resolution. Then there was a third resolution offered by Sen. Judd Gregg. The key is the Gregg resolution. All the Gregg resolution really said was that it's the Commander-in-Chief's duty to assign military missions and the Congress's duty to fund them. (Constitutionally, it's a ridiculous claim. But let's set that aside for the moment.)

Now, here's the rub. The Democrats wanted them all to go to a simple majority vote. The Republicans wanted each to go to a 60+ filibuster-breaking vote.

How do the two thresholds shape the debate?

If each goes to a simple majority vote, the anti-surge resolution wins, the pro-surge resolution loses and the Gregg amendment probably wins too. But the headline is the repudiation of the president. The Gregg amendment is an afterthought.

However, if each resolution goes to a 60 vote test, the thinking was that both surge resolutions (pro and con) would fail. And only the Gregg amendment would win.

So opposition to the president would lose and the only winning amendment would be one that gets the senate on the record saying that Congress is obligated to fund whatever missions the president chooses.

That's what happened.
This is not exactly comforting, nor is Joe Lieberman exactly the issue. The CW in D.C. is that the only resolution yesterday which would have met the 60+ vote test, is the grossly unconstitutional (in the sense that it isn't what the Constitution says) one that the President decides, and the Congress pays for that decision, and that that's the way it should be?

The vote yesterday was on party lines, and 47 Republicans (which is all of them, I'd understood) voted to defeat the motion that was part of the "parliamentary procedure." We know how Lieberman would vote. So 12 more Democrats, at least, would sign on to that resolution?

Tell me again what we won in November. Suddenly I'm very confused.

UPDATE: Well, here is a bit more clarity; and a correction on my memory of the vote count yesterday:

The procedural vote, which divided mostly along party lines, left the Democratic leadership 11 votes short of the 60 needed to begin debate on the bipartisan resolution. Forty-seven Democrats and two Republicans voted to open debate on the resolution; 45 Republicans and one independent were opposed.
And the reason the Gregg amendment would have passed with 60+ votes? Fear of not supporting the troops, of course. Although there is this:

Some Republicans admitted that they were unsure how long the unity would last and whether Republicans could continue to make a case against the resolution on procedural grounds. And two Republicans facing re-election in 2008, Senators Susan Collins of Maine and Norm Coleman of Minnesota, joined Democrats in voting to begin the debate.
Much that might be clearer is lost in the fog of procedure here. However, one thing does seem to be plain: the "lesson" of Vietnam rolls on. Which means many more will die before anything happens. And even then, the whole mess will probably be punted off until after the next Presidential election.

And then what?

Monday, February 05, 2007

"our culture is advanced beyond all that you can possibly comprehend with 100% of your brain"

Yeah, now I'm just milking it, but as watertigre would say: Face the snark.


"We understand now that in today's post-Sept. 11 environment, it was reasonable and appropriate for citizens and law enforcement officials to take any perceived threat posed by our light boards very seriously and to respond as they did," the statement said.
The soon to be infamous TBS apology. That, ladies and gentlemen and meatwads, is how you issue a non-apology apology with your $2 million downpayment on publicity money can't buy. And while you're at it:

BEWARE OUR LIGHT BOARDS!

You have been warned. Raise the terror level from Blackwatch plaid to Rush's "Moving Pictures" album. Yes, it's that bad.

What, you want proof? Okay. But remember: you asked for it.



" — a more obvious sight when darkness fell."*

Land of the free, home of the brave

or something like that:

"We understand now that in today's post-Sept. 11 environment, it was reasonable and appropriate for citizens and law enforcement officials to take any perceived threat posed by our light boards very seriously and to respond as they did," the statement said.
Turner Broadcasting Company, apologizing for creating a panic among the officials charged with maintaining security in Boston. Of course, we must keep this all in perspective:

"Last week's events caused a major disruption in the greater Boston area on many levels — crippling public transportation, causing serious traffic problems, negatively affecting local businesses and perhaps most significantly, costing Boston and surrounding communities thousands of dollars," [Massachusetts Attorney General Martha] Coakley said.

"We are fortunate that no one was injured," Coakley said. "We hope that this painful lesson will not be lived or learned again either by the communities involved or ... Turner Broadcasting and Interference." [sic]*
All because the security experts of Boston can't tell the difference between a lightboard powered by D-cells, and an explosive device. It is fortunate, indeed, that no one was injured.

Wet pants can be so dangerous.

Yes, I know, childish and immature of me. But as I've said before, I used to work for a lawyer who reminded me, time and again: "They don't pay us to be wrong." That cuts both ways. We don't pay security officials to ignore obvious dangers; but neither do we pay them to proclaim the sky is falling just because an acorn fell out of the tree onto their head. This was a grotesque over-reaction by Boston city officials, and all Turner has done is be a good citizen and pay some money to get Boston to shut up. And that money, we are assured, will be put to good use:

MBTA General Manager Daniel Grabauskas and MBTA Police Chief Joseph Carter said the money would be put to good use.

"We will develop a list of meaningful and effective homeland security and customer safety programs that will have an enduring effect on our customers," Carter said.
Turner Broadcasting, meanwhile, is laughing all the way to the bank. $2 million is cheap for this kind of publicity. Aqua Teen Hunger Force will probably do monster box office its opening weekend.

As Meatwad says: "I'm dumb, but I ain't that dumb."

Wonder if it'll be banned in Boston?



" — a more obvious sight when darkness fell."

*I just noticed this. And who says attorneys don't have a sense of humor, huh?

Oh, there's really too much out there today

Fr. Jakes asks:

When will we become weary of our fixation on the depravity of humanity and instead reorient ourselves towards the glory of God? When will we who "have the Holy Spirit inside" begin to act like the Beloved of God that we have always been intended to be?
When we stop focussing on our power, and start focussing on our vulnerability? When we stop thinking about ourselves, and start thinking about the others? When we stop exalting our ability to triumph and succeed and prevail, and start seeking to be last of all and least of all and servant of all? When we start to recognize the simple truth that "It's no longer the social norm to be a Christian,', as PB Jefferts Schori says?

This really isn't difficult. Most church goers are baptized heathens anyway. What they actually know about the Bible wouldn't fill a short paragraph. We could start there, just getting them to listen to what the Bible says, in all its contradictory, complex, and contrary glory. As Fr. Underhill told his congregation at All Saints in Attleboro: "the Bible...is the source of faith...which is used along with tradition and reason as the three authorities in the church." Maybe we could start there, huh? Just reading the Bible? People do it in college, now, as a literature course. When I entered graduate school almost 30 years ago, the Bible as literature was an almost heretical notion. Now, it's the only way many people encounter it. Perhaps we should acknowledge this reality.

Maybe if we stopped assuming everyone grew up in a church, some church, of some kind, somewhere. Maybe if we finally abandoned the notion of "Christendom," of church combined with state, we could start to get somewhere. Is this not orthodox? Is this bizarre? Or is it unorthodox to acknowledge the world around you? Maybe we should ask Augustine, after we finish reading The City of God. Maybe we should ask Luther, or Calvin. But wait until Calvin is through running Geneva, and Luther is through translating the scriptures into a language that isn't dead and limited only to those with enough education.

What was the question again?

I will admit, in a quibble, that I'm not so sure God became human in order that we could become divine, as PB Jefferts Schori is quoted as saying. That's a bit too Gnostic for me, and at some point I'll return to that (when I've plowed through more of The Nag Hammadi Library). But on these things we can, at least, have discussions. But for now, I'll steal (again!) what the MadPriest said, because it is so lovely:

The same applies to us. Those of you who have knelt at the knees of Jesus have no option either. Those of you who have the Holy Spirit inside cannot now evict him. You will be catchers of people. You cannot stop it. It comes with the package. That is why this church, full of people who love each other and who love God, is a healthy growing church in spite of our fear. We catch people and bring them into the Kingdom of God, and life doesn’t get more miraculous than that.
Amen.

The Churcheth that Emergeth

What the MadPriest said:

I am great believer in the proposition that God is unfailing in his redemption. But the speed at which good is coming out of bad at Falls Church is pretty fast even by The Father's standards. Ok, there aren't 2800 of them but the non-defectors are experiencing being church for the first time in many, many years. Small in number but they are a church - they are not having church done at them by power mad, authority craving egomaniacs.

And, as has been hinted at elsewhere in the neighbourhood over the last 12 months, the defection of the ultra-conservatives is allowing a return to the Church of all those faithful Christians exiled from the parish churches because they refused to accept the commands of the cult leaders who had taken over the churches.

And, the forced removal of the Episcopalians to the Presbyterian church hall has resulted in a weekly ecumenical get together that would have took years to arrange if left to the normal burocracy of the denominations involved.

In Falls Church a true Church is emerging. This will happen wherever those who hate try to extinguish the light. Let them do their worst - we have nothing to lose except all the stuff we should be getting rid of anyway.
I know of a UCC church here in Texas which loudly and publicly withdrew from the denomination over similar issues to those now roiling the Virginia churches. In a congregational polity, this move provoked no lawsuits or lingering church issues, but it was clearly done with an eye to provoking the formation of a new denomination of disaffected UCC churches from across the South, if not across the country.

It didn't work that way. The other UCC church in town, which had long lived in the shadow of the larger church, suddenly became "the" UCC church in town. Life otherwise went on as it had, and despite pastors "trained" in that church which actually went to other rural Texas churches seeking sympathy and schism, nothing took root. Why? Because, fundamentally, as MadPriest would say, most Christians are "bog standard" about it. But also because, despite the cries of a minority in any congregation, most people hate change, even if it means the change will "restore" the church they think they are used to. Which explains comments like this:

Meanwhile, the News-Press has learned of some dissention among the ranks of those Falls Church Episcopal members who voted to defect, claiming they’d been led to believe they were only choosing an alternative, more conservative leadership within the denomination, and that the denomination’s leadership would cooperate with their wishes to continue as usual at their current location. “We were brainwashed,” one such person was reported saying.
These things are never simple, and they are always about power as much as they are about identity:

More is also coming to light about the roots of Nigerian Archbishop Peter Akinola’s violation of the Anglican rules and traditions by claiming authority over elements of the denomination outside his jurisdiction. The Anglican Communion office in London has issued a terse statement saying Akinola’s U.S. group, calling itself the Convocation of Anglicans in North America (CANA), had not been granted “any official status within the communion’s structures, nor has the archbishop of Canterbury indicated any support for its establishment.”

According to 2003 and 2004 reports in the New York Times and the Tribune Newspaper of Nigeria, Akinola reacted forcefully against the elevation of the openly-gay U.S. bishop Gene Robinson in November 2003, and set up his U.S. organization in July 2004 as a specific reaction to it.

According to the Tribune, Akinola resolved to inaugurate an American diocese “to effectively cut off Nigerians from gay bishops in the United States,” saying he “cannot do the work of God with gay clergymen.” He called it “the Convocation of Anglican Nigerian Churches in America.”

Getting his foot in the door in the U.S. by claiming to represent only Nigerians, Akinola subsequently morphed his organization into CANA, a receptacle for dozens of defecting U.S. churches with no relationship to Nigeria.

At the time of the Robinson consecration, Akinola’s Nigerian Anglican Church had strong things to say, as well. “We totally reject and renounce this obnoxious attitude and behavior,” the church said in a statement, according to the New York Times. “It is devilish and satanic. It comes directly from the pit of hell. It is an idea sponsored by Satan himself and being executed by his followers and adherents who have infiltrated the church.”
Of course, the ugly of this has yet to come. As the article notes, the Diocese of Virginia has filed for a declaratory judgment (or something similar) to argue out the ownership issue, but has also asked for a restraining order to remove the "defectors." This is where things get interesting.

I had a member of my first church who was causing a bit of a problem, at least for the "leadership" of the church. At one point, that "leadership" told me to consider banning the man from the church, which as a bit sticky, not least because his wife was a member of the church. But the hardest part, of course, would be to actually block him from entering the building. Not only was I not going to do that as a minister (the request was outrageous), but it was an unenforceable principle absent some showing of criminal conduct (in Texas, it would have taken a peace bond to get police to bar him physically from the building). Needless to say, police blocking someone from entering your church is not a situation you ever want to have.

How, then, does this work? I assume the "defecting" priests will decline to force their way into the sanctuary to fight out who gets to serve the eucharist. And also, the Diocese can control the building by changing the locks. But what does the congregation do? Grumble? Protest? Leave quietly?

There is no ending to this story that doesn't look very ugly. It's a pity that this is what it takes for "the true church" to emerge.

I might as well add, again from the venerable MP, that the Revs. Underhill and Jabobs are right, too (there can be more than one!):

While he acknowledged that what had been happening at All Saints was distressful and painful, he reminded parishioners that they were not alone, and that both God and the diocese were supporting them.

"God is with us," Underhill said. "He has given us the mission to re-establish the congregation and the parish."

Jacobs told returning parishioners Sunday to leave the financial worries to the diocese and the church vestry, the parish's governing board, and to instead turn their attention to rebuilding the congregation and inviting others to join.

"Reach out to those who used to come here, and those who never came here," he said.
And, in a contrast of attitudes, note how many people returning to All Saints describe it as "coming home." Home, of course, is the place that, when you have to go there, they have to let you in. But it's also the place where you get to be yourself, rather than be so worried about who everyone else is. Or, as one church member puts it:

Nancy Leper of Attleboro said she has been a member of All Saints nearly all her life, and was very active in the parish, but stopped attending services there in recent years because of what Giuffrida was preaching. "He has these people mesmerized," she said of the Anglican congregation.
May the Falls Church story end on as quiet a note as this one.

"They made a movie about Iraq."

Forty years early.


There are 80,000 Arabs in the Kasbah. Are they all against us? We know they're not. In reality, it's only a small minority that dominates with terror and violence. This minority is our adversary and we must isolate and destroy it.
Watched "The Battle of Algiers" last night on TCM. Very interesting take on the French colony in Algeria. How accurate it was or wasn't is not for me to say. I can only say what I gleaned from the movie.

First, the French occupied Algeria for 130 years or so. I know, from reading a bit of Camus, that it was a complex issue, this occupation and colonization of another place, a place and people who, ultimately, did not want to be French. (The French establish a system of government where all regions under the control of Paris are essentially French. It's a very unitary system, as opposed to, say, an American one, where we establish "democracy" which we expect to be both independent, and just like us, simultaneously. Not saying it's right or wrong, but I do know enough about French political culture to know they don't so much establish colonies, as extend France. But I digress.)

The film focusses on individuals, but unlike a Hollywood production where a compelling personal story would be overlaid on historical events to give the audience an emotional hook, this film focusses on several people, all of them engaged in violence (not passionate romance against the backdrop of a world gone mad!), and all of them quite capable of justifying their violence. The narrative is really quite simple.

The film opens with a voice over of a message to the Algerians from the National Liberation Front, the FLN (au Francais)*, declaring the need for liberation. At first, the mechanism of this liberation is to kill French gendarmes. This finally forces the police to shut down the city and set up check points in and out of the Muslim quarter of Algiers. Lots of sandbags and curlicues of barbed wire force pedestrians past the guards, who inspect all who pass. Shades of Baghdad, or perhaps occupied Palestine.

This only leads to an increase in violence against men in uniforms. Finally, one such street murder leads to outrage in the French quarter of Algiers, and an innocent Algerian street peddler is accused by the crowd of the murder. He is chased, captured, and taken to jail. Interestingly, the French police and military (who come in later) are portrayed sympathetically. They always offer "a fair trial" and at least the pretence of justice. But the street peddler soon disappears (I must admit a poor memory here, so forgive me if I bobble a plot point or two) from the story, because a group of Frenchman who know the man's address(I think they are lead by the police chief whom we've been sympathetic with, because he uses his credentials to pass a checkpoint after curfew) travel to his house (an apartnment, essentially) and light the fuse on a rather large package. A bomb, of course, which kills not only his family, but destroys much of the building the apartments are in.

This act of cowardice sparks a clamor for revenge, which the FLN orchestrates and promises to provide. And so they do, disguising three Algerian women as Europeans, who easily pass the checkpoints carrying time bombs to three very public locations. Here, again, there is no flinching. The locations are not remotely military. They are a bar, a "milk bar" (think malt shop), and the French airline terminal. Young people, even small children, are shown in these locations, and they are the sure victims of the explosions.

The response is predictable: more violence from the French government, this time through the military. A Lieutenant Colonel is given full civil and military authority in Algiers, and he uses it ruthlessly, though in such a civilized manner you don't even notice the knife in his hand. He instructs his men that Algiers is a "battlefield" (and yes, that term should have resonance today) and that extraordinary means must be used to gather intelligence about the plans of the enemy. Without ever using the word torture (as he notes later in a press conference, that word never appears in his orders), he clearly orders his men to torture suspects in order to gain information.

Long story short, the violence continues, on both sides, but the French have an advantage: the cut off the head of the FLN, finally capturing all the leadership, which effectively ends the struggle. Or should, except 5 years after the FLN is effectively extinguished, France was forced to give Algeria its independence. But the precise reasons for that are beyond the scope of the film, except that the Algerian desire for freedom doesn't die with the last FLN leader.

Perhaps the most interesting part of the film is a press conference with one captured FLN leader. When asked if bombs in public places aren't cowardly, he counters that it is no worse than dropping napalm from airplanes, and says: "Give me your planes, and I will give you my bombs." Another FLN leader says, earlier, that it is hard to start a revolution, hard to sustain it, and even harder to win it. But after that, he says, the real hard work of governance begins. The FLN, in other words, and the French, are portrayed even-handedly. Both use violence without remorse or apology (the women who plant the first bombs show no misgivings as they scan the room and see young children, or teenagers, who are soon to die), and both have their reasons for what they are doing. Both escalate the violence, each with a justification based on their reaction to the reaction of their opposition. When the French destroy the FLN, it is with a bomb that, again, levels a building, and as the French military officers walk away satisfied with their "mission accomplished," they ignore the looks of horror on the faces of every Algerian crowding the neighborhood. The ending of the film, with the return of an independence movement, is perhaps only a surprise to the French characters in the film.

If anything, perhaps, it was too neat a picture; or perhaps not. The French were quite concerned with being civilized and doing justice. The Lt. Colonel makes the arrests of all the leaders of the FLN, assuring them they will get a fair trial. He is determined and relentless, but while he is also ruthless, that is more the result of his mission than of his personal desires or interests. The FLN leaders are equally ruthless, but they have their mission, too.

So it was about Iraq, but not about Iraq. The French were the government there. The rebels threatened to destroy that government, and used violence to do so. We used violence to destroy the government of Iraq, and foolishly imagined new governance would spring up like plants in the springtime. In many ways, "The Battle of Algeria" is an object lesson in how one cannot contain an insurgency forever in a colony. In many ways, it is also a lesson in how completely stupid, futile, unnecessary, and just damned evil, the invasion of Iraq was. The French controlled Algeria for 130 years. We hever controlled Iraq for 10 minutes. The French established a government, which the Algerians eventually rejected. We destroyed the one government Iraq had, and thought we could contract out for a quick replacement. The French lived in Algeria, had connections to the Algerians that made it seem quite plausible the military would have enough intelligence to snap off the head of the FLN in a few years. We still don't seem to know who our enemy in Iraq is: Al Qaeda? Iran? Jordan? Syria? "Insurgents"? Former Baathists? We've had so many public explanations of what would finally end this war that we've stopped even paying attention to them, or calling anyone to account for them.

What struck me, finally, about Algeria, was that the French government had a duty (at least!) to its colony. America had one duty to the Iraqis: know damned well what we were doing before we moved in and kicked over their anthill, no matter how brutal and repressive Saddam Hussein was. It is telling, now, that not even George Bush tries to argue Iraq is better off than it was under Saddam Hussein. Dick Cheney said it, but he's been universally regarded as marginally insane for voicing that opinion. The French understood their posture in Algeria, and aparently decided, a mere 5 years after crushing the FLN, that staying was no longer an option (perhaps the violence never really abated in the countryside, but the film indicates the real impetus for independence was centered in Algiers, where the violence went on hiatus for 2 years, and then demonstrations began again, which lead to independence 3 years later). The French had 130 years in Algeria, and finally knew it was time to go.

When does America learn that lesson about Iraq? More to the point: when does our political leadership learn it?


*for the pedants in the crowd, yes, it actually opens with the capture of a rebel, and then goes into flashback. But it's easier to explain the story this way. Pipe down.

Sunday, February 04, 2007

Of Super Humans and the Church

Sadly, Atrios can't get a conversation started no matter what he does. The usual suspects over there are a herd of cats, and you'd have an easier time loading frogs in a wheelbarrow than keeping them on a topic. This one, though, struck me as interesting, especially as it relates to the church, and especially to TEC today (for the original, click and hold while moving the cursor down to "reveal" the text. A post on revelation as a source of knowledge will follow shortly):

I tend to react negatively to anything which floats above, or suggests that floating above, the muck is the only productive or honorable course. This is the view of David "pox on both their houses [especially the Democrats] " Broder, the "everybody but us are losers" attitude of the South Park guys, Nader's Gush and Bore, etc... And, ultimately, this is part of the message of Children of Men. The government is right wing and bad. The dissenters are left wing and bad, and so bad they team up with Islamic terrorists and see revolution as an end in itself. Salvation is to be found not within but outside the system. Only those who set up camp outside the existing order offer possible salvation.

I've got nothing against those who see the corruption of the system as an insurmountable problem, it's those who apparently see human nature as an insurmountable problem but then imagine there are Super Humans who can somehow transcend this.

Within that framework the movie had a lot of interesting and perceptive bits, but too often the motives of the political actors were left unexplained. Why was the government obsessed with deporting foreigners? No clear rationale (reasonable or not) was offered. Why were the revolutionaries obsessed with revolution as an end in itself? Why were they united with the Islamic terrorist/revolutionaries?

The political message of "everyone sucks" but "somewhere saviors exist" is a very common one, and it tends to come from people who lack their own coherent ideological foundation.

-Atrios 1:04 AM
The last sentence there is not just a "political message." It's a message rampant in any human organization (or dis-organization). Certainly its been the message in the church since, oh, about the beginning.

I blame Deuteronomy.

I don't, really, but the Deuterenomists are the model for this kind of thing. Struggling to re-create a national (not in the nation state sense, but in modern terms we'd say the "racial" sense, but we can't say that because of the negative overtones, so let's stick with "national" even though it's wrong) identity, the scholars and lawyers of Israel decided to go "back to basics. Taking their cue from the prophets, they put the burden of responsibility for the Exile on the apostasy of the people, and set out to make sure that would never happen again. In effect, they restated the law (a concept lawyers still use today; or legal scholars, anyway). But the restatement carried with it the implicit concept that deviation from the law would bring disaster (which, to be fair, wasn't part of the Biblical narrative before that point). It was, in fact, not minor deviations from the law that the Prophets decried, but wholesale abandonment of the laws of Moses. Several hundred years later, however, it was easier to see the problem as one of minor aberrations, the better to be sure such a thing never happened again.

Such is the deep wound of trauma. Wendell Berry calls racism in America our "hidden wound." It's the same concept, so that now even intelligent people like Sen. Joe Biden can't help but express themselves in less than felicitious terms.

Enter Jesus, and the synoptic Gospel writers' depictions of the Pharisees. But what does this have to do with a modern movie and the church?

There are always groups who want perfection, and who want to "float above the fray" in order to get it. Atrios mentions David Broder, but Ted Koppel gave a fine example in a piece of performance art NPR labeled "Commentary" yesterday. By even-handedly blaming both the GOP and the Democrats for the debacle in Iraq, and by also refusing to posit any solution other than the unacceptable status quo, Koppel managed to antagonize both sides (there can be only two!) and therefore claim the status of "objective journalist" and "wise man" (because the wise are never involved, and always point out that both sides [there can only be two!] are wrong, which is the height of wisdom. Or it's taken for that, anyway.) Those who are disgusted with this kind of bickering simply want to take their ball and go home, even if it isn't their ball. Now the concept is the church should provide that place where I, and those who agree with me, can "float above the fray," that place where everyone, especially me, can be the same yesterday, today, and forever, and when anyone does change, it won't be notice, because we'll all change together. So that any change, however minor, is apostasy, unless I, and those who think like me, approved of it first. The message is "Everyone sucks, but somwhere a savior exists. Who won't ask anything of me, except that I be faithful to what I already want to conform myself to."

Corruption in the system is, you see, an insurmountable problem. Those who can't live with that want to be neither hot nor cold. They don't want ambiguity, and they don't want certainty; they want comfort. They want simplicity. They want the "big idea" to save them, so they don't have to do anything. Above all, they want to be sure they don't have to do anything. They don't want the burden of being Super Humans; but they want to Super Humans to come and save them from the rest of us, the ambiguous and the zealous alike. For them, that's what the savior is for: to save them from all these other people.

And that's the central problem of the church: that it's full of all these "other" people. In a sense, this is the great weakness of Protestantism: if you don't like it here, go start your own church! But that's too easy; it's too much of a cop-out, an escape valve. And iwhile it's the weakness, t's not the issue here. The issue is not, ultimately, the people you have to put up with in church. It's the idea of a church that you have to identify with. The problem is not a topical question, but an existential one. Who am I, if I identify with a group that espouses a position I consider immoral, unethical, or just unacceptable? Isn't that the idea of the Super Humans? That they will be just like us, or at least we will be able to identify with them, and in doing so, they will do all the heavy lifting, and we can just enjoy the fruits of their onerous labours?

But it never works out that way. Sartre said "Hell is other people," but Sartre also said that when we choose for ourselves, we choose for all humankind, a terrible burden that no Super Human can take away from us. He might as well have gotten the idea from Johannes de Silentio, who took it from Abraham. Everything begins with Abraham. When Abraham made the choice on Moriah, God or Isaac, he made the choice for Isaac and Sarah and the rest of us, too. God had told Abraham he would be a blessing on the nations. Who else did he choose for when he raised the knife, if not everyone else, including himself?

No wonder we prefer to believe in a Super Human who will take the choice away from us. No wonder, as I hope to show later, we are so interested in what we call "gnosticism." It always comes back to the Church of Meaning and Belonging v. the Church of Sacrifice for Meaning and Belonging. As Johannes de Silentio's example of the Knight of Faith showed, there is a reward for the sacrifice. But as Abraham showed, that reward is unseeable until the sacrifice is fully offered. And until we are sure the sacrifice must be made, and no one will stop us from making the sacrifice, we can't earn the reward of the sacrifice. And so we continue to identify with the group that identifies with us; and we continue to fail to see that our true identity is in all humankind, at least until we are prepared, fully and finally, to sacrifice even that.

Mysterium tremendum, indeed (let the reader understand). As Leonard Cohen wrote of the martyrdom of Joan of Arc: "Myself, I long for love and light; but must it come so cruel, must it be so bright?" No wonder we prefer to believe in Super Humans who will save us from this terrible choice.

Triangulation

Read this.

Open me first.

Then drink me.

Finally, eat me.

Now, connect the dots. Coincidence? I think not.

Saturday, February 03, 2007

Never on Super Bowl Sunday

This, of course, just begs for rebuttal; or at least context.

Farmland Friends on Friday joined churches nationwide in abruptly canceling its Super Bowl party for fear of violating a federal copyright law that prohibits public venues from showing NFL games on big-screen TVs.

Sports bars are specifically exempted. Churches are not.

The law has been widely ignored for years. Churches routinely draw hundreds of fans to annual Super Bowl parties; some denominations openly use the events as tools for evangelism. The Christian magazine Sports Spectrum even markets a Super Bowl party kit for churches. This year, however, a celebration sponsored by Falls Creek Baptist Church in Indianapolis caught the attention of a National Football League attorney, Rachel L. Margolies.

She ordered the church to cancel its party and remove the trademarked Super Bowl name from its website. The Indianapolis Star picked up the story Thursday — and by Friday, pastors across Indiana and beyond were scrambling to yank down their Super Bowl banners and give away their trays of burgers.
I know what you're thinking, but wait for it.

This Super Bowl is especially meaningful not only for Northside New Era Missionary, but for churches nationwide. Both Dungy and Chicago Bears head coach Lovie Smith are deeply faithful Christians; both have credited their successful seasons to the Lord. "We're giving all the glory to God," Colts owner Jim Irsay said last month.

Some pastors planned to make the most of the Christian subtext to the game by using their Super Bowl parties to show videos of Dungy and Smith testifying about their faith. Others had prepared brief halftime sermons about character. "It's used as a vehicle to open up conversations about faith," said Joseph Price, a professor of religious studies at Whittier College who teaches about sports and faith.
Well, and the problem is:

Jumbo screens "have the potential to draw thousands of people, and if we had that going on across the country, it would eventually erode the television ratings," McCarthy said.
And then there's the context. Remember Christmas, 2005?

This Christmas, no prayers will be said in several megachurches around the country. Even though the holiday falls this year on a Sunday, when churches normally host thousands for worship, pastors are canceling services, anticipating low attendance on what they call a family day.

Critics within the evangelical community, more accustomed to doing battle with department stores and public schools over keeping religion in Christmas, are stunned by the shutdown.

It is almost unheard of for a Christian church to cancel services on a Sunday, and opponents of the closures are accusing these congregations of bowing to secular culture.

"This is a consumer mentality at work: `Let's not impose the church on people. Let's not make church in any way inconvenient,'" said David Wells, professor of history and systematic theology at Gordon-Conwell Theological Seminary, a leading evangelical school in Hamilton, Mass. "I think what this does is feed into the individualism that is found throughout American culture, where everyone does their own thing."

The churches closing on Christmas plan multiple services in the days leading up to the holiday, including on Christmas Eve. Most normally do not hold Christmas Day services, preferring instead to mark the holiday in the days and night before. However, Sunday worship has been a Christian practice since ancient times.
Quick question: which event exemplifies the consumer mentality? Closing on Christmas Day because it's not worth the effort? Or having a Super Bowl party, complete with jumbo screen TV, so you can preach to the masses?

Comparisons to Salvation Army soup kitchens are probably inappropriate, too, huh?

Eisehnhower was right

Follow this argument carefully; it's very interesting, and in an earlier day, would have been called "shrill."

But first, the context: the column focusses on an NBC story about soldiers in Iraq who fell insufficiently supported by the American public. Having detailed their compliants, Arkin points out:

These soldiers should be grateful that the American public, which by all polls overwhelmingly disapproves of the Iraq war and the President's handling of it, do still offer their support to them, and their respect.

Through every Abu Ghraib and Haditha, through every rape and murder, the American public has indulged those in uniform, accepting that the incidents were the product of bad apples or even of some administration or command order.

Sure, it is the junior enlisted men who go to jail. But even at anti-war protests, the focus is firmly on the White House and the policy. We don't see very many "baby killer" epithets being thrown around these days, no one in uniform is being spit upon.

So, we pay the soldiers a decent wage, take care of their families, provide them with housing and medical care and vast social support systems and ship obscene amenities into the war zone for them, we support them in every possible way, and their attitude is that we should in addition roll over and play dead, defer to the military and the generals and let them fight their war, and give up our rights and responsibilities to speak up because they are above society?

I can imagine some post-9/11 moment, when the American people say enough already with the wars against terrorism and those in the national security establishment feel these same frustrations. In my little parable, those in leadership positions shake their heads that the people don't get it, that they don't understand that the threat from terrorism, while difficult to defeat, demands commitment and sacrifice and is very real because it is so shadowy, that the very survival of the United States is at stake. Those Hoovers and Nixons will use these kids in uniform as their soldiers. If it weren't about the United States, I'd say the story would end with a military coup where those in the know, and those with fire in their bellies, would save the nation from the people.

But it is the United States, and the recent NBC report is just an ugly reminder of the price we pay for a mercenary - oops sorry, volunteer - force that thinks it is doing the dirty work.
Yes, in the pages of the Washington Post: in order to save democracy, we might have to destroy it.

No, he doesn't quite say that, because he doesn't quite mean that. If this parable "weren't about the United States" is his caveat; and it's a sound one. I think 11/7 and the recent polls show Americans value their democracy far more than they value either military power or fear-mongering. The fact is, of course, our "volunteer" army (properly "mercenaries," as Arkin says, but that's such an ugly term) is not the armed forces of World War II, citizen soldiers mobilized to defend the nation against a gang of attackers. Or even the citizen soldiers of the Cold War, mobilized to protect us against the non-existent threat of falling dominoes in Asia. These aren't even the disillusioned draftees of Vietnam.

These are people paid to go to war. It isn't "volunteer." It's a job. It's a dirty job; but it's still a job. Still, as Arkin says, the question is: is this the job they need to be doing?

The notion of dirty work is that, like laundry, it is something that has to be done but no one else wants to do it. But Iraq is not dirty work: it is not some necessary endeavor; the people just don't believe that anymore.

I'll accept that the soldiers, in order to soldier on, have to believe that they are manning the parapet, and that's where their frustrations come in. I'll accept as well that they are young and naïve and are frustrated with their own lack of progress and the never changing situation in Iraq. Cut off from society and constantly told that everyone supports them, no wonder the debate back home confuses them.

America needs to ponder what it is we really owe those in uniform. I don't believe America needs a draft though I imagine we'd be having a different discussion if we had one.
The discussion we need to be having is: why do we have a standing army at all? After WWII, the answer was: because it would have stoopped Hitler earlier (never mind that almost no one in America wanted to do anything about the situation in Europe before Pearl Harbor was attacked). During the Cold War, the answer was: because of the Commies! Domino theory! Containment!

Now? Now we see the danger of a standing army. During the Cold War, the argument about the inevitability of nuclear exchange was that no weapon had ever been developed that hadn't been used. True for the atomic bomb; not true. it turned out, for the hydrogen bomb. But the argument applies to armies, too, and was why the US never had a large standing army: it's too much of a temptation to use it like an imperial force, to send it into foreign countries on a flimsy pretext and once it's there, dare the legislature to pull it out.

Which is precisely where we are today. Democrats in Congress, even those outside it, like John Edwards, all remember '68. They remember McCarthy running on an anti-war platform, and not even getting the nomination. They remember Nixon's "secret plan" to end the war, up against McGovern's "anti-war" campaign (and McGovern, unlike the current crop, was a WWII veteran, someone from "The 'Good' War"). They've learned the lesson: Americans don't vote for candidates who won't use our military when it's needed. The question is: when is it needed?

And we really haven't addressed that question squarely since the end of World War II. The very survival of the United States is at stake, but not from terrorists or any outside enemy. The United States, after all, has never been more than an idea. That's why we always look back, now to the "Founding Fathers," to "original intent" or the Constitutional Convention or the words of Ben Franklin and George Washington. We want to remain true to the Idea.

But it's time to talk about how far from that idea we have strayed, and how we get back closer to it. Arkin is right: if we had a draft, this would be a very different conversation. But it needs to be a conversation about how we, as a country, interact with other countries. Instead, it's still a discussion of what we, the citizens, who keep forgetting we are the sovereigns (that was the "Idea" of the Founding Fathers, remember?), owe to the "nation"? JFK was right: we should be asking what we can do for our country. But he meant what we can do for each other. He didn't mean what we can to do increase the profits of Exxon and Halliburton.

Friday, February 02, 2007

"What we have here is a failure to communicate!"

Or, just a Generation Gap:

Young, hip Bostonians who are familiar with the unconventional marketing tactics used by many companies tended to see the city's reaction as unmitigated hysteria.

Tracy O'Connor, 34, a retail manager, called Boston's response "silly and insane," contrasting it with the response in the other cities where no one reported any concerns about the devices -- an advertising gimmick for the TV show "Aqua Teen Hunger Force."

"We're the laughing stock," she said.

But public safety officials, as well as a large segment of Boston's older generation, condemned the publicity campaign as unthinkable in today's post-9/11 world.

"Just a little over a mile away from the placement of the first device, a group of terrorists boarded airplanes and launched an attack on New York City," police Commissioner Edward Davis said in an interview with The Associated Press.

"The city clearly did not overreact. Had we taken any other steps, we would have been endangering the public," he said.
Oh, come on, you know what this is about.

And I love the justifications here. "Just a little over a mile away from the placement of the first device, a group of terrorists boarded airplanes and launched an attack on New York City." Um, yeah, and you didn't see New York City flip out about these things, did you? (Note to Boston: NYC had at least 41 of these things. Your link to 9/11 to justify hysteria only serves to make you look more stupid.)

But the last bit there, is the best: " 'The city clearly did not overreact. Had we taken any other steps, we would have been endangering the public,' he said." Three weeks late; and you reacted to lite-brite signs wired with D-cell batteries.

Nope, no overreaction there. Or here.




" — a more obvious sight when darkness fell."*

And I take it back: we're laughing at you, now.


*I have decided this should be not only the logo, but the motto, for this "crisis."

Candlemas--February 2 (a/k/a "Groundhog Day")

Ceremony upon Candlemas Eve--Robert Herrick

Down with the rosemary, and so
Down with the bays and mistletoe;
Down with the holly, ivy, all
Wherewith ye dressed the Christmas hall;
That so the superstitious find
No one least branch left behind;
For look, how many leaves there be
Neglected there, maids, trust to me,
So many goblins you shall see.


At Candlemas--Charles Causley

'If Candlemas be fine and clear
There'll be two winters in that year';

But all the day the drumming sun
Brazened it out that spring had come,

And the tall elder on the scene
Unfolded the first leaves of green.

But when another morning came
With frost, as Candlemas with flame,

The sky was steel, there was no sun,
The elder leaves were dead and gone.

Out of a cold and crusted eye
The stiff pond stared up at the sky,

And on the scarcely breathing earth
A killing wind fell from the north,

But still within the elder tree
The strong sap rose, though none could see.


The Gospel according to St. Luke, Chapter 2

22 And when the days of her purification according to the law of Moses were accomplished, they brought him to Jerusalem, to present him to the Lord;

23 (As it is written in the law of the LORD, Every male that openeth the womb shall be called holy to the Lord;)

24 And to offer a sacrifice according to that which is said in the law of the Lord, A pair of turtledoves, or two young pigeons.

25 And, behold, there was a man in Jerusalem, whose name was Simeon; and the same man was just and devout, waiting for the consolation of Israel: and the Holy Ghost was upon him.

26 And it was revealed unto him by the Holy Ghost, that he should not see death, before he had seen the Lord's Christ.

27 And he came by the Spirit into the temple: and when the parents brought in the child Jesus, to do for him after the custom of the law,

28 Then took he him up in his arms, and blessed God, and said,

29 Lord, now lettest thou thy servant depart in peace, according to thy word:

30 For mine eyes have seen thy salvation,

31 Which thou hast prepared before the face of all people;

32 A light to lighten the Gentiles, and the glory of thy people Israel.

33 And Joseph and his mother marvelled at those things which were spoken of him.

34 And Simeon blessed them, and said unto Mary his mother, Behold, this child is set for the fall and rising again of many in Israel; and for a sign which shall be spoken against;

35 (Yea, a sword shall pierce through thy own soul also,) that the thoughts of many hearts may be revealed.

36 And there was one Anna, a prophetess, the daughter of Phanuel, of the tribe of Aser: she was of a great age, and had lived with an husband seven years from her virginity;

37 And she was a widow of about fourscore and four years, which departed not from the temple, but served God with fastings and prayers night and day.

38 And she coming in that instant gave thanks likewise unto the Lord, and spake of him to all them that looked for redemption in Jerusalem.

39 And when they had performed all things according to the law of the Lord, they returned into Galilee, to their own city Nazareth.

40 And the child grew, and waxed strong in spirit, filled with wisdom: and the grace of God was upon him.

Early Christian Writings

This is fascinating.

A friend in ministry just sent me that link. Read the list over carefully; it's a Biblical scholar's view of early Christian writings; by which I mean, you'll note it includes the canonical texts of the New Testament. Not texts most lay people think of as "early Christian writings," at least not in a context like this. But this wonderful list not only puts them in context, but in chronology. Note, for example, that all of Paul's letters predate the first gospel in the canonical order. Notice, too, all the documents in between the canonical gospels and the late date of some of the letters. And then all the stuff that never made it in.

As I said, this is fascinating. Shoot, I may have to get the CD!

Louder and Funnier

Or, Bush Bombs in Peoria:

On Tuesday, President Bush popped in for a surprise visit to the Sterling Family Restaurant, a homey diner in Peoria, Ill. It’s a scene that has been played out many times before by this White House and others: a president mingling among regular Americans, who, no matter what they might think of his policies, are usually humbled and shocked to see the leader of the free world standing 10 feet in front of them.

But on Tuesday, the surprise was on Bush. In town to deliver remarks on the economy, the president walked into the diner, where he was greeted with what can only be described as a sedate reception. No one rushed to shake his hand. There were no audible gasps or yelps of excitement that usually accompany visits like this. Last summer, a woman nearly fainted when Bush made an unscheduled visit for some donut holes at the legendary Lou Mitchell’s Restaurant in Chicago. In Peoria this week, many patrons found their pancakes more interesting. Except for the click of news cameras and the clang of a dish from the kitchen, the quiet was deafening.

“Sorry to interrupt you,” Bush said to a group of women, who were sitting in a booth with their young kids. “How’s the service?” As Bush signed a few autographs and shook hands, a man sitting at the counter lit a cigarette and asked for more coffee. Another woman, eyeing Bush and his entourage, sighed heavily and went back to her paper. She was reading the obituaries. “Sorry to interrupt your breakfast,” a White House aide told her. “No problem,” she huffed, in a not-so-friendly way. “Life goes on, I guess.”
Reading the obituaries? Is that a hint? No matter, they still love W. on Wall Street:

On Wednesday, Bush went to Wall Street to deliver remarks on the economy. CNN and MSNBC carried portions of the speech live, but Fox News Channel, a network that has been viewed as sympathetic to this White House, did not, opting instead to air reports on immigration and the 2008 presidential race. At least Bush got a raucous reception from traders (typically a GOP-friendly crowd) when he paid a surprise visit to the New York Stock Exchange trading floor.
Of course, Wall Street doesn't have the votes Peoria represents:

Will it work? Unfortunately for this White House, polls find that the public not only doesn’t believe that the economy is getting better, they largely don’t give Bush credit for gains in the economy. According to a Gallup poll released last week, a majority of those polled—53 percent—believe economic conditions are getting worse. Meanwhile, in a poll conducted two weeks ago, Gallup found that just 45 percent approved of Bush’s handling of the economy—a number that has been virtually unchanged in recent months.
Obituary, indeed.

Thursday, February 01, 2007

Yeah, this is gonna work

AP:

Officials found 38 blinking electronic signs promoting the Cartoon Network TV show "Aqua Teen Hunger Force" on bridges and other high-profile spots across the city Wednesday, prompting the closing of a highway and the deployment of bomb squads. The surreal series is about a talking milkshake, a box of fries and a meatball. The network is a division of Turner Broadcasting Systems Inc.

"It's clear the intent was to get attention by causing fear and unrest that there was a bomb in that location," Assistant Attorney General John Grossman said at their arraignment.

The 1-foot tall signs, which were lit up at night, resembled a circuit board, with protruding wires and batteries. Most depicted a boxy, cartoon character giving passersby the finger — a more obvious sight when darkness fell.

The men did not speak or enter their own pleas, but they appeared amused and smiled as the prosecutor talked about the device found at Sullivan Station underneath Interstate 93, looking like it had C-4 explosive.

"The appearance of this device and its location are crucial," Grossman said. "This device looks like a bomb."

Some in the gallery snickered.
And if that isn't bad enough (and it is), here's where the case falls apart on legal grounds:


Outside the courthouse, Michael Rich, a lawyer for both of the men, said the description of a bomb-like device could be used for any electronic device.

"If somebody had left a VCR on the ground it would have been a device with wires, electronic components and a power source," he said.
That's called "unconstitutionally vague," and it's deadly in criminal cases. And here's the other reason:


Judge Paul K. Leary told Grossman that, according to law, the suspects must intend to create a panic to be charged with placing hoax devices.

It appears the suspects had no such intent, the judge said, but the question should be discussed in a later hearing.

Peter Berdovsky and Sean Stevens were released on $2,500 bail, said Mike Rich, their attorney. The next pre-trial hearing is scheduled for March 7.
So, a judge who says "Huh?" at first blush, and snickers in the gallery.

I'd almost pay to be the lawyer for the defendants in this case.

The Democracy Now! Interview

Because as much as I love Molly's words, I loved them in her voice even more.

I mean, I can just hear her saying this:

"The rest of the country is in future shock and in Texas we can't get Curtis' Clean Crapper bill through the Legislature. Curtis Graves is a state representative from Houston who introduced a bill to provide minium standards of cleanliness in public restrooms in this state. It was defeated. Solons rose on the floor of the House to defend dirty johns. The delights of peein' against the back wall after a good whisky drank were limned in excruciating detail. In New York City, Zero Mostel gets up on a stage and prances around singing "Tradition!" while the audience wets itself with nostalgia. In America, the rate of change shifts from arithmetic to geometric progression. In Texas, where ain't nothin' sanitized for your protection, we will peein' against the back wall.

"What this country really needs, along with a new government, is a stiff dose of Texas. Things still are the way they used to be down here, and anybody who thinks that's quaint is welcome to come dip into the state's premier product. Like Johnny Winter sings, 'They's so much shit in Texas/you bound to step in some.' "

"I love the state of Texas, but I regard that as a harmless perversion on my part and would not, in the name of common humanity, try to foist my pathology off on anyone else. Texas is a dandy place, in short spells, for anyone suffering from nausee de Thruway Hot Shoppe. It is resitant to Howard Johnson, plastic, interstate highways, and Standard Television American English. But the reason it's resistant to such phenonema is because it's cantankerous, ignorant, and repulsive.

"The reason the sky is bigger here is because there aren't any trees. The reason folks here eat grits is because they ain't got no taste. Cowboys mostly stink and it's hot, oh God, it is hot. We gave the world Lyndon Johnson and you cowards gave him right back. There are two major cities in Texas: Houston is Los Angeles with the climate of Calcutta; to define Dalls is to add a whole new humongous dimension to bad.

....

"Texans do not talk like other Americans. They drawl, twang, or sound like the Frito Bandito, only not jolly. Shit is a three-syllable word with a y in it.'

"Texans invent their own metaphors and similies, often of a scatological nature, which is kind of fun. As a group, they tell good stories well. The reason they are good at stories is because this is what anthropologists call an oral culture. That means people here don't read and write much. Neither would you if the Dallas Morning News was all you had to read."

Any wonder she got me through lonely, homesick times? By the way, NYT; she was known in Austin for the French dinners she served friends at her home.

So there. Yankees.

By the way, this is how you edit Ms. Ivins. NYT, take note. Because you get this kind of writing (again, about Texas, her best subject):

"…Should you happen to contravene a law made by the only politicians we've got, this too will become a matter of some moment to you. For example, if you happen to possess six or more phallic sex toys, you are a felon under Texas law. In their boundless wisdom, our solons decided that five or fewer of the devices make you a mere hobbyist."

Molly, we hardly knew ye

The obituary I was actually waiting for. From the Grey Lady:

In 1976, her writing, which she said was often fueled by “truly impressive amounts of beer,” landed her a job at The New York Times. She cut an unusual figure in The Times newsroom, wearing blue jeans, going barefoot and bringing in her dog, whose name was an expletive.
I do have to say this is not a trait peculiar to the late Ms. Ivins, but more a product of Yankees who insist on stereotyping Texans (and which we, in turn, constantly use to our advantage. Yankees are so easy...):

Covering the Legislature, she found characters whose fatuousness helped focus her calling and define her persona, which her friends saw as populist and her detractors saw as manufactured cornpone. Even her friends marveled at how fast she could drop her Texas voice for what they called her Smith voice. Sometimes she combined them, as in, “The sine qua non, as we say in Amarillo.”
Yes, NYT, we do know such words here in the Lone Star State. Why, we even have a university or two.

But this is why I was waiting for this obit particularly:

Covering an annual chicken slaughter in New Mexico in 1980, she used a sexually suggestive phrase, which her editors deleted from the final article. But her effort to use it angered the executive editor, A. M. Rosenthal, who ordered her back to New York and assigned her to City Hall, where she covered routine matters with little flair.
The phrase, of course, was "gang-pluck." Even in death, the Grey Lady has to edit the Texas Lady. I also hoped to see this, of course; presented in the pages of the mitey New York Times with absolutely no irony at all. The "paper" is The Texas Observer:

Indeed, rarely has a reporter so embodied the ethos of her publication. On the paper’s 50th anniversary in 2004, she wrote: “This is where you can tell the truth without the bark on it, laugh at anyone who is ridiculous, and go after the bad guys with all the energy you have.”
God bless her. She was Texan through and through, and there'll never be another one like her.

It's still funny

But not in Boston, where I fully expect the movie to be banned:

"It is outrageous, in a post 9/11 world, that a company would use this type of marketing scheme," Mayor Thomas Menino said. "I am prepared to take any and all legal action against Turner Broadcasting and its affiliates for any and all expenses incurred during the response to today's incidents."
Actually, what's outrageous is that a bunch of "1-foot tall signs" that "resembled a circuit board, with protruding wires and batteries" and "depicted a boxy, cartoon character giving passersby the finger" would prompt a police response that allegedly cost $500,000.00.

Boston needs to get a grip. Instead:

They arrested two men who put up the electronic promotions and vowed to hold Turner accountable for what Menino said was "corporate greed," that led to at least $500,000 in police costs.

Turner said the devices have been in place for two to three weeks in 10 cities: Boston; New York; Los Angeles; Chicago; Atlanta; Seattle; Portland, Ore.; Austin, Texas; San Francisco; and Philadelphia. As soon as the company realized the Boston problem, it said, law enforcement officials were told of their locations in all 10 cities.
Still no answer as to why the other 10 cities didn't notice; or freak out.

"We apologize to the citizens of Boston that part of a marketing campaign was mistaken for a public danger," said Phil Kent, Turner chairman.
But the rest of the country is left wondering: What's the Matter with Boston?

"Everyone can play a part by holding Turner Broadcasting to account for today's events," Suffolk District Attorney Daniel Conley said. "Viewers, advertisers, license holders, can and should make clear to them this sort of behavior is reckless, irresponsible and illegal."

"Commerce was disrupted, transportation routes were paralyzed, residents were stranded and relatives across the nation were in fear for their loved ones in the city of Boston," Conley said.
Um, and that's Turner Broadcasting's fault? Hello? Anybody in there?

Peter Berdovsky, 27, of Arlington, and Sean Stevens, 28, of Charlestown, were each charged Wednesday night with one count of placing a hoax device and one count of disorderly conduct. State Attorney General Martha Coakley said they were hired to place the devices. Both men were to be arraigned Thursday morning.
I want to defend that case. I want to hear the state's argument that these were "hoax devices." I'm trying to imagine the law that would reasonably cover these things, and stand up to judicial review.

Those conducting the campaign should have known the devices could cause panic because they were placed in sensitive areas, Coakley said. Authorities are investigating whether Turner and any other companies should be criminally charged, she said.
IOW, they should have known the officials of Boston were terrified children with no sense of humor; or of valid dangers. If I lived in Boston, I'd be wondering about my civic leadership by now, not the wisdom of a couple of marketers.

"We're not going to let this go without looking at the further roots of how this happened to cause the panic in this city," Coakley said.
Try the mirror.

In Seattle and several suburbs, the removal of the signs was low-key. "We haven't had any calls to 911 regarding this," Seattle police spokesman Sean Whitcomb said Wednesday. Police in Philadelphia said they believe their city had 56 devices.

In New York City, local news broadcasts showed images of the devices being collected, and the New York Post reported that police confiscated 41 in Manhattan and Brooklyn.
Let's see: that's 97 in two major cities, v. 10 in Boston. That's almost no notice, and certainly no panic, in 10 cities, v. a city shutdown and a national news story. Who is the source of the problem, again? And it gets worse. It took three weeks for anyone in Boston to notice:

Berdovsky, an artist, told The Boston Globe he was hired by Interference and said he was "a little kind of freaked out," by the furor.

"I find it kind of ridiculous that they're making these statements on TV that we must not be safe from terrorism, because they were up there for three weeks and no one noticed. It's pretty commonsensical to look at them and say this is a piece of art and installation," he told The Globe.


The Mooninite had the right idea.



" — a more obvious sight when darkness fell."

Wednesday, January 31, 2007

Requiescat in pacem



Molly Ivins made it possible for me to survive leaving Austin and Texas in some of the darkest, hardest, loneliest and most homesick days of my life. I took her first book with me, Molly Ivins Can't Say That, Can She?, and her words made me actually miss Texas politics, while I was laughing so hard about it my sides hurt and my eyes watered.

I always meant to send the book back to Austin to ask her to sign it, after a newspaper article said she'd do so happily. Now I still have my memories of her, and her wonderful words. Maybe someday somebody will publish all those words in one set, so we can keep them forever.

It's literature, pure and simple.

I really didn't think it would bother me this much. But I'm gonna miss her. She's the one who taught me to tell people who asked how I was, "Fine as frog hair." And then grin, real big, the way you're supposed to.

I am really gonna miss her. We all are.

The AP "obituary" is here. This one is better. More as I find them.

Before I go to bed, I have to add this. It's making the rounds, but I got it from Scout Prime:

We are the people who run this country. We are the deciders. And every single day, every single one of us needs to step outside and take some action to help stop this war. Raise hell. Think of something to make the ridiculous look ridiculous. Make our troops know we're for them and trying to get them out of there. Hit the streets to protest Bush's proposed surge. If you can, go to the peace march in Washington on Jan. 27. We need people in the streets, banging pots and pans and demanding, "Stop it, now!"
Can I get an "Amen!"?


I will teach you my townspeople
how to perform a funeral
for you have it over a troop
of artists—
unless one should scour the world—
you have the ground sense necessary.

See! the hearse leads.
I begin with a design for a hearse.
For Christ's sake not black—
nor white either — and not polished!
Let it be whethered—like a farm wagon—
with gilt wheels (this could be
applied fresh at small expense)
or no wheels at all:
a rough dray to drag over the ground.

Knock the glass out!
My God—glass, my townspeople!
For what purpose? Is it for the dead
to look out or for us to see
the flowers or the lack of them—
or what?
To keep the rain and snow from him?
He will have a heavier rain soon:
pebbles and dirt and what not.
Let there be no glass—
and no upholstery, phew!
and no little brass rollers
and small easy wheels on the bottom—
my townspeople, what are you thinking of?
A rough plain hearse then
with gilt wheels and no top at all.
On this the coffin lies
by its own weight.

No wreathes please—
especially no hot house flowers.
Some common memento is better,
something he prized and is known by:
his old clothes—a few books perhaps—
God knows what! You realize
how we are about these things
my townspeople—
something will be found—anything
even flowers if he had come to that.
So much for the hearse.

For heaven's sake though see to the driver!
Take off the silk hat! In fact
that's no place at all for him—
up there unceremoniously
dragging our friend out to his own dignity!
Bring him down—bring him down!
Low and inconspicuous! I'd not have him ride
on the wagon at all—damn him!—
the undertaker's understrapper!
Let him hold the reins
and walk at the side
and inconspicuously too!

Then briefly as to yourselves:
Walk behind—as they do in France,
seventh class, or if you ride
Hell take curtains! Go with some show
of inconvenience; sit openly—
to the weather as to grief.
Or do you think you can shut grief in?
What—from us? We who have perhaps
nothing to lose? Share with us
share with us—it will be money
in your pockets.
Go now
I think you are ready.
--William Carlos Williams

Sorry, but it is funny


Too funny. When Atrios had this story up, they were "boxes of Doom" which perplexed everyone and seemed to be the work of pranksters.

Now, of course, the world knows it was simply viral marketing:

Turner Broadcasting, parent company of Cartoon Network, said the devices, which consisted of magnetic, blinking lights, were part of a promotion for the TV show "Aqua Teen Hunger Force."

"The packages in question are magnetic lights that pose no danger," Turner said in a statement. It said the devices have been in place for two to three weeks in 10 cities: Boston, New York, Los Angeles, Chicago, Atlanta, Seattle, Portland, Ore., Austin, Texas, San Francisco and Philadelphia.

"We regret that they were mistakenly thought to pose any danger," the company said.

Police said only that they were investigating where the device came from. The Department of Homeland Security said there are no credible reports of other devices being found elsewhere in the country.
It's the last bit that gets me. Turner says they've been up everywhere. DHS, those sterling promoters of fear and trembling, insist they have no "credible reports" that this is true.

This probably means every executive of Turner Broadcasting and Time/Warner is now on a "no-fly" list, in perpetuity. Because, after all, just because a major corporation says it and that leaves egg all over the face of Boston police and the DHS, doesn't mean it's "credible."

Frankly, it's all worth it just to read this in a news account:

The show follows the misadventures of a carton of french fries, a milkshake and a wad of hamburger meat who live together in a run-down suburban house. A feature-length film version of the show is scheduled to come out in March.
One more reason to go on living.

And scoutprime has "the rest of the story." Remember, everyone, the rest of us aren't laughing at you; we're laughing near you.



Be afraid. Be very afraid.