"I would like to say 'This book is written to the glory of God', but nowadays this would be the trick of a cheat, i.e., it would not be correctly understood."--Ludwig Wittgenstein
"OH JESUS OH WHAT THE FUCK OH WHAT IS THIS H.P. LOVECRAFT SHIT OH THERE IS NO GOD I DID NOT SIGN UP FOR THIS—Popehat
Reporter: Can you assure the world that as you try to get control of Greenland and the Panama Canal, you are not going to use military or economic coercion?
As I said before, Greenland is part of NATO through Denmark. If he attacks Greenland, he attacks NATO. Whether we are in NATO, or not (and no, I don’t think he can unilaterally remove us from NATO; but that’s another matter). When Nixon came up with his “madman” theory, this is not what he was talking about.
(Trump is just preening for the cameras, here. There’s no “negotiating strategy” in this. He might as well say the moon is made of green cheese and he claims all that cheese for America. Think George III, not Hitler seeking lebensraum.)
Q: You didn't rule out using military coercion --
TRUMP: Well, we need Greenland for national security purposes. People don't even know if Denmark has any legal right to it. But if they do, they should give it up. pic.twitter.com/D74jFXZsln
Trump: Gas heater is much less expensive, the heat is much better, it's a much better heat. As the expression goes, you don't itch. Does anybody have a heater where you go and you're scratching? That's what they want you to have. They don't want you to have gas pic.twitter.com/XVvfaNC5Qv
Marjorie Taylor Greene says she has already directed her staff to write legislation officially changing the Gulf of Mexico to the Gulf of America pic.twitter.com/9GNMitb43r
Trump calls in and Junior puts him on speaker. He says we need to take over Greenland because there are “ships sailing around and they’re not the right ships.” pic.twitter.com/gFDJxpvMKf
We're really supposed to believe Greenland is MAGA because Don Jr. and Charlie Kirk found some drunks at a bar in the morning and made them wear MAGA hats for a photo op?
Charlie Kirk playing the role of Peter Minuit offering $24 worth of beads for Manhattan to 20 people in a Greenland restaurant. pic.twitter.com/NMMF5qdjrt
The video Trump posted on Truth Social of a man in Greenland in a MAGA hat saying he wants the US to take over is a convicted drug trafficker. https://t.co/1hyzkXtvCe
Trump wraps up his news conference: "We wanna get back those hostages ... If this deal's not done with the people representing our nation by the time I get to office, all hell is going to break out. Thank you very much." pic.twitter.com/MdONn6mFaW
Short of nuking the entire Middle East into glass, what does he think will make things worse for Hamas in Gaza? Israel has already rendered it unfit for human habitation. Where does it go from there?
Get used to it guys. Four more years of Captain Crazypants.
— ππ¦ππππ_πΎπ¦π£π (@SundaeDivine) January 7, 2025
Lara Trump: They lied when they said they wanted a smooth and peaceful transition. That was a lie because what they’re doing, throwing everything in Donald Trump’s way, trying to thwart the will of the American people.. is absolutely disgraceful… pic.twitter.com/byPeppQosI
The will of the American people is stated in the Constitution. And that means Joe Biden is President until Trump is given the oath of office. Now, if Biden leaves town before the inauguration and fires the White House staff and leaves the doors locked…that would constitute an absolutely disgraceful act.
Lara Trump: Do not forget Donald Trump eradicated ISIS, they were gone, nobody was talking about them anymore. The guy in New Orleans was an ISIS sympathizer pic.twitter.com/6KIKfbKiGQ
Jennings: Before we canonize St. Kamala, let's remember the electoral count reform act of 2022 makes it perfectly clear that the vice president has nothing but purely ministerial duties this day. She didn't actually certify the results of the election. pic.twitter.com/yTtd8mUnMW
A) A ministerial act is not a mere formality. It is one required by law, and not a choice of the officeholder under the obligation. It is still an official act.
B) The Electoral Count Reform Act merely codified what was the law under the Electoral Count Act and Article II, sec. 2, clause 3. Nothing substantive was changed from 2020.
C) The impetus of the Electoral Count Reform Act was due to the efforts of Trump to overturn the election of that year.
VP Kamala Harris: "Today, I did what I have done my entire career, which is take seriously the oath that I have taken many times to support and defend the Constitution of the United States." pic.twitter.com/jONODivgFK
His excuse was, he didn’t like the court’s rulings.
"Judge Lewis J. Liman ruled after hearing Giuliani testify for a second day at a contempt hearing called after lawyers for the election workers said the former New York City mayor had failed to properly comply with evidence production requests over the last few months," The Washington Post reported. The report continued, "Giuliani conceded during Monday’s testimony that he sometimes did not turn over everything requested because he believed the requests were overly broad or inappropriate or even a 'trap' set by lawyers for the plaintiffs."
Need I say that determination is up to the court, not the parties? The judge had to.
According to MSNBC's Adam Klasfeld, who is live tweeting the case, "Liman quotes then-10th Circuit Judge Gorsuch's comments against Giuliani: 'Discovery is not supposed to be a shell game, where the hidden ball is moved round and round and only revealed after so many false guesses are made and so much money is squandered.'
"Apparently Judge Liman has imposed the proverbial 'death penalty' sanctions against Giuliani, drawing an adverse inference on the production of discovery in connection with the homestead exemption that is the major issue for trial on Jan 16th that will foreclose Rudy from contesting it."
Let me translate that for you.
Rudy has two residences, one of which he’s been ordered to surrender for liquidation (he’s refused to provide the papers for that; it’s part of the contempt hearing). He claims the $3.5 million condo in Florida is his residence. Under Florida law that makes it exempt from collection, no matter what its value. But Rudy delayed providing evidence to establish his claim; and now it’s too late. That’s the “adverse inference.” It’s the legal equivalent of FAFO. Rudy fucked around. Now he’s gonna find out.
And yes, this effort is costing the plaintiffs. They can recover their attorneys fees for all of this. But $148 million covers a lot of attorneys fees, with a whole lot left over. On that subject, Giuliani’s lawyer has thoughts:
"Let’s be clear. This case was brought by Hunter Biden’s former law partner Michael Gottleib — a current partner at Willkie, Farr & Gallagher — who claimed he was taking on this case out of the goodness of his heart. Why is Willkie, Farr & Gallagher pouring so many resources, and using so many lawyers on this case to try and destroy Mayor Rudy Giuliani? It appears that they are a part of this ongoing politically motivated vendetta against Mayor Giuliani," said Goodman.
Or there’s $148 million to be collected, and my guess is they get some percentage of that in the end.
He continued: "Willkie, Farr & Gallagher might be happy to fight to take away Mayor Giuliani’s most cherished personal belongings including his signed baseball jersey of his childhood hero and his grandfather's pocket watch, but they can never take away his extraordinary record of public service, where he lifted more people out of poverty than any modern mayor, took down the Mafia, cleaned up Wall Street, saved New York City and comforted the nation following September 11th," Goodman concluded.
And then Giuliani slandered those women. Actions have consequences. That’s the whole basis of tort law. Goodman and his client should know that.
With accumulating fees and post-judgment interest piling on…Rudy is a prize dumbass.
There are some who say “your life won’t change much when trump is President” and I get why they’re saying that in the sense that I’m well off and a citizen who was born here to parents who aren’t gonna be deported either, but all else aside fuck yourself, I have a conscience
What did you do to prevent Trump winning the election? Will it be as effective as what you will do to protect those you now profess to be so concerned about? Concern is all well and good, but what does your oh-so-public concern do for those you profess will be hurt ? And what does it do for you?
Do your BlueSky pronouncements protect them? Your concerns? Your defiance? Or will all of that and $5 buy a cup of coffee at Starbucks?
Here’s where I remind you this was a democratic election and the people, damn their eyes, have made their choice. And that most of them won’t feel the effect of Trump’s actions or inactions. They’ll feel what they’re told to feel, more like; what they wish to feel. They already feel better about the economy, because they’ve been told the last guy was the problem. When Trump wrecks it, and wreck it he will, they will be quick to blame him, and slow again to note the recovery, unless they are told to appreciate what is actually happening, and not just expected to on their own.
But they won’t notice that other people are finally better off; nor will they care. Their own government-in-waiting is already telling them to be suspicious of military personnel who go overseas where they will encounter “dangerous” ideas (the kind we must protect our children from in schools!). That’s the government they just voted for. And you think your journalism and your social media posts and your concern are going to save us from that?
Grow up. The sooner you figure out it’s not all about you, the better off you’ll be. My life won’t change much with Trump as President. I’m not poor, I’m not an immigrant, and I’m a white male. But how concerned I am, in public or private, won’t change things, either. If I find some people to help, and I help them, that will be as much as I can do.
And better than bragging about my virtuous concern on the intertoobs.
“You can resolve to live your life with integrity. Let your credo be this: Let the lie come into the world, let it even triumph. But not through me.” Solzhenitsyn
Canadian MP Charlie Angus responded to President-elect Donald Trump's proposal to make Canada the 51st U.S. state by noting that existing laws prevent "sexual abusers" from leading his nation. https://t.co/lVMpoUSKkd
Businessman and "Shark Tank" star Kevin O'Leary confirmed that President-elect Donald Trump is hosting discussions at Mar-a-Lago about integrating Canada into the United States.
O'Leary told Fox News he participated in the discussions at Mar-a-Lago after Trump suggested on Truth Social that Canada would become the "51st state."
I’m not a businessman, nor do I play one on TeeVee, but I’ve got some time, and I always wanted to visit Canada.
I had two topics that I wanted to talk to him about," O'Leary explained. "Number one was integrating Canada towards a North American union for greater strength, just period."
"The world is a difficult place these days, and most Canadians would like to look at that opportunity without giving up their sovereignty," he continued. "So low-hanging fruit would be combined currency, for example, combining the Bank of Canada with the Fed, things like that."
O'Leary said he pleaded with Trump to "give the Canadians a chance to re-elect a leader, just like you got re-elected, that has a four-year mandate, just like you have, and let's get down to business."
The businessman also presented Trump with a plan to purchase TikTok from its Chinese parent company.
"Trump will be who we have to work with to close the deal in the months ahead," O'Leary explained. "So I wanted to let him know, as well as others in his cabinet, that we're doing this and we're gonna need their help."
I can speak for we, the people, right? Or does O’Leary have a mouse in his pocket?
Either way, does Trump think this is how government works? Or does he just like the attention?
This is a great example of impotence people adopt when they say **DOJ** is responsible for Trump dodging accountability.
The entire story is about how Trump repackaged what happened w/Jan6. Entire story is about how by doing so, GOPers jumped on that myth and so refused to hold him accountable.
So long as you pretend that a guilty verdict would have mattered in the face of this myth, when 1000 other guilty verdicts have been easily spun away, you are misdiagnosing the problem, and absolving the failure to combat THIS MYTH for responsibility.
Or the narrative that Bezos, Cook, Musk, Zuckerberg and Pichai are ALL fascists now. Or, you know, you could follow the money:
"Why are Bezos, Zuckerberg, Musk, Pichai and Tim Cook visiting and giving money to Trump? Because they are in 'The Race' to become the dominant platform in the world," he said. "Amazon/Anthropic vs FB/LLama vs Google/Gemini vs Twitter/Grok, vs IPhones/ChatGpt is the penultimate global power war ever."
Cuban also claimed that these billionaires "don’t care about Trump."
"But they can’t let him put his 'thumb on the scale' and push them back, or one of the others forward. Giving millions and kissing a ring when trillions are at stake, is nothing," he said. "The Ring Kissers truly don’t know where AI will take their businesses or the world."
Cuban went on to explain how their artificial intelligence fight could be impacted by the president elect.
"They just know they can’t let Trump write an executive order or make a move that changes the balance of AI power. And honestly, despite all the things to despise (and admire) about each, it’s in the interest of national security and our economy for the dominant AI companies to be American," he elaborated. "I think we all wish they were better actors as a group. And the anti trust actions will hopefully clean some things up. Just realize they all look at this as their own version of Survivor. They each know that any of them could be the next IBM. A once dominant company turned into an afterthought."
So long as you pretend that those corporate leaders are all fascists in democratic clothing, Cuban says, you are misdiagnosing the problem. The problem here is Trump. Watch the donut. Don’t give the narrative the power. It’s not reality. Zuckerberg is fading fast (he’s trying to revive his fortunes by reintroducing his VR nobody wanted the first time). Musk is watching Cybertrucks pile up on the factory parking lot as the stock drops. Twitter is not the powerhouse controlling the national narrative so many want to complain it is. BlueSky is on the way to making Twitter into MySpace. Musk has his government contracts, but his place in the marketplace is as tenuous as Zuckerberg’s.
Google and Apple are better positioned to market their AI. But will one of them be the next IBM? Can they take that chance with such a mercurial and capricious President? Trump forces them to curry favor. It’s a more reasonable explanation than that they’ve all suddenly become MAGA. I mean, Musk certainly has. But that’s one more reason Tesla sales are off.
And I have to underline this: the idea that Musk controlled the national discussion and got Trump elected is ludicrous. All signs point to the campaigns not really changing minds. Elmo’s efforts started late, even as people were fleeing Twitter (and Twitter never was the tail wagging the national dog). His GOTV efforts were absolutely amateurish (and Harris’ apparently were the success they were promised). He turned Twitter into a white South African’s racist dreamscape, but that’s why Twitter has lost 80% of its value.
Besides, firms who gave Trump money the last time, avoided his tariffs. If it’s a pay-to-play system, the problem is Trump. If you want to argue that companies and corporations have an obligation to be moral and not support corruption, I’ll counter with the reality that individuals can make moral decisions that require sacrifices, but corporate entities (companies, governments, even churches) will make decisions seen to be in the best interests of the group. Tim Cook is not obligated to put Apple out of business in order to appease critics of Trump. And contributions are not bribes (unless they are, and then it’s a legal matter). The tech bros, in Cuban’s analysis, are playing the game in order to stay alive.
The corruption is in the White House. But we, the people, voted to put it there. And unless you can show actual bribery in Trump’s action; and unless Justice Barrett’s opinion prevails (but that would only swing one vote in the Trump v US analysis) π§, there’s really nothing the system can do about . For the next four years, anyway.
I just want to mention that “I don’t even HAVE Facebook” has not quite reached the level of insufferable signaling that “I don’t even HAVE a television” once was, but goddamned if some of you aren’t doing your absolute best.
I have been on Facebook twice; both times because a business was there, and there alone (yes, this was a long time ago). Both times I had to sign up to get any use out of it.
I didn’t. Sign up, I mean.
I have Twitter and BlueSky accounts. I only use them to read. I never post on either one, and never want to. I wasted eons of precious time (so it seems now) on Salon’s Table Talk (you must be this old πto remember that), and still more time on a blog to remain nameless here. Now I confine myself to this little noticed space where it pleases me to spout off all but unnoticed.
That is just fine with me. Besides, I never wanted to be telling people I’d stubbed my toe or eaten a meal. I didn’t want to know that about them, either.
I am neutral about not having Facebook.
But if I mention Facebook and you come in saying WELL I DON’T HAVE FACEBOOK you probably have other unfortunate social habits, like poetry or public masturbation.
President Biden is permanently banning offshore drilling in 625 million acres of US oceans.
He's doing it under the Outer Continental Shelf Lands Act which was written so a presidential action under its authority is permanent and differs from other executive actions.
If Trump wants to attempt to reverse it, then Congress would likely have to change the law.
So part of the modern argument about religious belief is that it's simply a function of the brain; that we can study people in prayer or meditation and find certain portions of the brain are active, and this activity indicates religious belief is simply a brain function some people are capable of.
Of course, no similar studies are ever cited to show that reasoning, say working in higher mathematics or considering a scientific principle, is also simply a function of the brain, so reasoning is no more a mirror of nature or reality than prayer is proof of the existence (or even presence) of God. But that is beside the point: the point is, this method of analysis is new, is revolutionary, has never been done before, and it proves something that could not otherwise have ever been shown about religion. It stands outside religion and reveals truths that could not otherwise have been revealed.
Enter the Magi.
Matthew calls them astrologers, actually. The word he uses is μάγοι, which Bauer tells me refers to a "wise man and priest, who was expert in astrology, interpretation of dreams and various other secret arts." They read the stars, took lessons from them, discerned meanings, and from their knowledge, learned the truth of the significance of the birth of Jesus in Bethlehem. Does this mean it happened that way? No. The story clearly serves Matthew's purposes, as it can't be reconciled with Luke's nativity in any way, and besides involves a miracle (the star "led them forward until it came to a standstill above where the child lay") which we can in no way verify from the historical record.
But it is Matthew telling us that other means than the Hebrew prophets were used to learn the nature of the child born in Bethlehem to Mary and Joseph. It is Matthew telling us that the knowledge of the world (astrology then; neurology now) was employed to discern a great truth.
Is it true the Magi read the stars and found the Christchild through a miracle? Is it true prayer is only brain activity and nothing more, just like reasoning? Is it possible that reasoning is more than simply firing neurons? Is it possible prayer is more than simply active portions of certain cells? Is it possible to know truths from knowledge that is not itself religious, or from a field of human knowledge other than a specific religion and religious tradition?
The Epiphany story tells us it is. The Epiphany story tells us that it has happened. It doesn't prove that is has happened; but it accepts, even incorporates into religion, the possibility. It stands in the future, looking backwards, waiting for us to catch up.
Which is a revelation in itself; or an apocalypse, if you read Greek.
'A cold coming we had of it,
Just the worst time of the year
For a journey, and such a long journey:
The ways deep and the weather sharp,
The very dead of winter.'
And the camels galled, sorefooted, refractory,
Lying down in the melting snow.
There were times we regretted
The summer palaces on slopes, the terraces,
And the silken girls bringing sherbet.
Then the camel men cursing and grumbling
and running away, and wanting their liquor and women,
And the night-fires going out, and the lack of shelters,
And the cities hostile and the towns unfriendly
And the villages dirty and charging high prices:
A hard time we had of it.
At the end we preferred to travel all night,
Sleeping in snatches,
With the voices singing in our ears, saying
That this was all folly.
Then at dawn we came down to a temperate valley,
Wet, below the snow line, smelling of vegetation;
With a running stream and a water-mill beating the darkness,
And three trees on the low sky,
And an old white horse galloped away in the meadow.
Then we came to a tavern with vine-leaves over the lintel,
Six hands at an open door dicing for pieces of silver,
And feet kiking the empty wine-skins.
But there was no information, and so we continued
And arriving at evening, not a moment too soon
Finding the place; it was (you might say) satisfactory.
All this was a long time ago, I remember,
And I would do it again, but set down
This set down
This: were we led all that way for
Birth or Death? There was a Birth, certainly
We had evidence and no doubt. I had seen birth and death,
But had thought they were different; this Birth was
Hard and bitter agony for us, like Death, our death.
We returned to our places, these Kingdoms,
But no longer at ease here, in the old dispensation,
With an alien people clutching their gods.
I should be glad of another death.
"With help from his GOP enablers and voters who can’t seem to be bothered to give a damn, Trump has normalized White House corruption to an extent that would’ve been unthinkable in Carter's era." https://t.co/KOtM6rAHT0
...it became perfectly thinkable under Reagan; then George H.W.; Speaker Gingrich; George W.; and Trump, who arguably only lost to Biden because of Covid (and the terrible job Trump did with it).
It's funny that all these MAGA folks who worry about government and police surveillance cheered on Elon Musk for quickly giving over data about Matthew Livelsberger, the Green Beret who died in the Cybertruck explosion, to the authorities.
What she’s talking about is Tesla had a record of everywhere the car went on its trip to Vegas. But this is standard for almost all new cars with GPS. “New” being a relative term, you understand.
My Volvo (now four years old) can tell me what street I’m on, and provide maps to destinations. I have an app on my phone that can tell me where my car is and when it’s in use. I’m pretty sure that means Volvo has that information.
If I’m in a wreck, or need help, I can push a button and the car calls Volvo for me. If I’m not sure where I am, Volvo could accurately direct emergency services because if my car’s internal GPS. I imagine Volvo can even unlock my car, and start it remotely, two things I can also do from my phone.
Elmo is really just keeping up with the Joneses, here. OTOH, my Volvo would never do this:
hi @elonmusk - FSD v13.2.2 just drove me to a train line here in Santa Monica. sending this video clips and hopefully you guys can fix it fast. (i was shaking and i had to ran a red light to save my life). pic.twitter.com/GOERJSEcTq
to all people saying that why i didn’t take over, i did. from my experience it’s really hard to predict how the FSD would turn the wheel during turns. (and during FSD turns you don’t keep your hand on the wheel) the previous FSD handles this turn correctly and i saw the wheel starts to turn so i disengaged immediately when i saw the radius is wrong. this case is particularly tricky cuz i can not back up nor i can make lane changes (fence on the left and curb on the right, with single lane traffic). my immediate reaction is to check if there’s a train approaching behind me and there is. so my only option is to drive forward and exit at the very next exit. not knowing for sure how this particular train will react, i figured i should move out of it regardless.
i just hope tesla fix it and make improvements.
That tweet drew a reply that clearly he didn’t do something right, but the issue is: why should he have to? The worst my Volvo has done is plot a route that’s the long way ‘round. Of course, the most my car will do by itself is back into a parking space, and I don’t even trust it to do that. But Tesla is largely the reason why.
I'll stick to walking. It is amazing how those who get into a swivet about one act of extremely intrusive surveillance will be entirely OK with another, even more intrusive one or even many which they voluntarily permit. Or what I learned in the Edward Snowden caper.
Yup. I should have added that my car won’t spontaneously combust on a parking lot, or while charging. And if it does catch fire, it won’t lock me in.
Well, Howie, what we know or what we seem to have known about this individual was, yes, he served in the U.S. military, but he also went overseas, I think, to the Middle East, where many think he was radicalized over there and then came through Canada before he came back into the United States," Lewandowski replied deceptively.
"So, you know, we have to make sure that we are vigilant of checking everybody coming to this country and making sure we know where they're coming in from," he added. "Even American citizens, look, they have a right to travel. Of course, they do. But making sure that we understand that we're dealing with the mental health crisis that this person clearly had."
While being deployed with the U.S. Army, Shamsud-Din Bahar Jabbar returned from Afghanistan in 2010 with an apparent layover in Canada.
And sure, Trump knew that. Last Wednesday. After the false FoxNews report.
Aside from the idea this argument makes all military personnel deployed overseas, suspect. The idea of the “holy motherland” is going to be heard more and more often, I fear.
Precisely what I will be doing this weekend, ironically enough...
January 5th; the twelfth day of Christmas.
The season of epiphany follows Christmas. That season begins on January 6th, and commemorates the arrival of the Magi following the star to worship the Christchild. "Epiphany" comes from the Greek word "epiphaneia," which my Bauer (Greek lexicon) translates as "appearance", with the intransitive verb form "to show." Interestingly, the English word was so associated with the church that as recently as some 20 years ago the OED entry for the word still gave a first definition as the festival on January 6th, commemorating the visit of the Magi, and the second definition "A manifestation or appearance of some divine or superhuman being."
So it has almost always been a "religious" word in English.
Interestingly, too, the Greek word ("epiphaneia") only appears in the letters of the New Testament, and once in the Gospels: in Luke 1:79.
To shine on those sitting in darkness, in the shadow of death, to guide our feet to the way of peace.
The last "verse" of the song of Zechariah, the "Benedictus."
One can make a lot of idle speculation of all of this. Epiphany is actually at the heart of Christianity, and causes the constant friction Christianity has had with Greek rationalism ab initio. Greek epistemology, via Aristotle, was based on the idea that knowledge was "discovered" from the natural world (so for centuries those we now call "scientists" were referred to as "natural philosophers"). Plato's epistemology is often considered to be different, but the difference is really only in type, not in kind. For Socrates knowledge came, not from the "illusory" world, but from the "real" soul, and the memories recovered there via the instruments of the illusory world. Either way, though, the most important knowledge is "discovered" by the activity of the subject.
Hebraic epistemology, on the other hand, and such as it was, centered on revelation, on the revealing of knowledge from the source of all things: the Creator.
This is not a mere academic concern. Much has been made about Paul's writings, and how they are less valid than the Gospels because Paul never knew Jesus (neither did the Gospel writers, most likely), and mentions little about the life of Jesus, and nothing about his teachings, but claims authority based on his "revelation."
"for surely you have already heard of the commission of God's grace that was given me for you, and how the mystery was made known to me by revelation, as I wrote above in a few words..." --Ephesians 3:2-3.
Revelation, for many in Paul's audience, was grounds enough for a claim to authority, one that would then be tested against the "proven" revelation of the Scriptures. To his Gentile audience, Paul would then appeal to a different kind of knowledge; but this brings us to Matthew, and the story of the Magi.
The story itself is really quite simple. A lot of traditions have grown up around it, to the point we are convinced Matthew mentions three wise men (he only mentions three gifts), and that the star "led" them to the stall (that's Luke, by the way) in Bethlehem, all the way from "the East." (The star directs them to the Holy Family after they get as far as Herod.) In fact, it's the traditions around Matthew that have led to speculations about whether the star was a nova (Johannes Kepler's theory), a comet (Halley's?); or even a planetary conjunction. I remember attending a presentation on the “Star of Bethlehem” at a planetarium, so there’s still a modern effort to explain it scientifically. Which shows, in part, the pervasiveness of Greek epistemology. Or maybe it's just a "human tendency." But, as Yeats asked, how can you know the dancer from the dance?
Back to Matthew: First, the star doesn't move until the end of the story. What the Magi report to Herod is that they have seen the new king's star "at its rising," and have come to pay him homage. A bit of Greek epistemology, I think, intruding into Matthew's Jewish world. Nature reveals a truth Herod's scholars have missed, until it is pointed out to them. Of course, creation responds to the creator, so Matthew is not going too far off the reservation.
Still, the Magi don't know everything, and have to rely on the Holy Scriptures for final directions. It is only then that the star "moves" and guides them until it stands still over the spot where the child lay. Which may simply mean it brought them at night (a powerfully metaphorical scene, that; the light shining in darkness.) to the home of the Holy Family. Remember, this is Matthew's nativity: no shepherds, no angels in the sky, no census to drag them to a manger. They live in Bethlehem. Why do I insist on the distinction? Because Matthew tells us Herod ordered the death of all males 2 years old and younger, based on what the Magi had told him. So "lay" doesn't mean an infant unable to sit up. (A point emphasized in the Gospel of Pseudo-Matthew: that the flight into Egypt takes place two years after the birth in the cave. “And when the second year was past, Magi came from the east to Jerusalem, bringing great gifts." Chapter 16, Gospel of Pseudo-Matthew. I find these small details fascinating.)
What, then, is the Epiphany? Traditionally, it is the revealing of Jesus to the Gentiles. Perhaps there is even a bit of unintended bias involved in it, as most of the early church "fathers" were primarily Greek in their epistemology, and sympathetic to a story that gave them an opportunity to "see" the Christchild in signs available to those without knowledge of the Scriptures, but also signs that required them to come to the Scriptures for full understanding. Certainly Augustine and Aquinas would find that a comforting tale.
But it is also the crucial story for Christians, a much more important story than simply the chance to wear coloured robes and lead a camel through the church. It is the story of how we know what we know, and where our knowledge truly comes from. It is not a story with an answer, however. As T.S. Eliot intuited, it is a story that only points in a direction.
A story worthy of more meditation and consideration than we are wont to give it.
And besides, Twelfth Night was always the occasion for a final Christmas party! Too bad the woke mob of Puritans took all that away…
The end of the story in which they flee from Herod to become illegal aliens in the United States of the area is what resonates most for me. Jesus, Mary and Joseph as the aliens who Mike Johnson and the rest of those Republican-fascists want to die on razor wire in the river.
That’s a comment from last year, when I posted this. Sadly, the situation is little changed.
All the streets are filled with laughter and light
And the music of the season
And the merchants' windows are all bright
With the faces of the children
And the families hurrying to their homes
While the sky darkens and freezes
Will be gathering around the hearths and tables
Giving thanks for God's graces
And the birth of the rebel Jesus
Well they call him by 'the Prince of Peace'
And they call him by 'the Savior'
And they pray to him upon the seas
And in every bold endeavor
And they fill his churches with their pride and gold
As their faith in him increases
But they've turned the nature that I worship in
From a temple to a robber's den
In the words of the rebel Jesus
Well we guard our world with locks and guns
And we guard our fine possessions
And once a year when Christmas comes
We give to our relations
And perhaps we give a little to the poor
If the generosity should seize us
But if any one of us should interfere
In the business of why there are poor
They get the same as the rebel Jesus
Now pardon me if I have seemed
To take the tone of judgement
For I've no wish to come between
This day and your enjoyment
In a life of hardship and of earthly toil
There's a need for anything that frees us
So I bid you pleasure
And I bid you cheer
From a heathen and a pagan
On the side of the rebel Jesus
--Jackson Browne
As Jesus told his disciples, those who were not against him, were with him. Which is the reverse of that all-too common phrase, and a much more inclusive one by its reversal.
At least for the moment national publications are radically understating the contents of Matthew Livelsberger's political minifestos which call for a violent, militia-backed "culling" of Dems from and national rebirth of "masculinity" under the rule of Trump, Musk and Bobby…
As a final point, let me return to the question we’ve discussed over the last few days: what was the political message of torching a Cybertruck in front of a Trump hotel? He actually answers that more or less clearly in the second minifesto: “This was not a terrorist attack, it was a wake up call. Americans only pay attention to spectacles and violence. What better way to get my point across than a stunt with fireworks and explosives?”
One might quibble over whether it was a terrorist attack. But I will give Livelsberger his due inasmuch as he does not appear to have intended to injure others, at least not in the vicinity of a Trump venue. He’s pretty clear: making something go boom around big Trump and Musk identifiers would get everyone’s attention. As indeed it did.
Yes, you’re getting the point. In his own words:
Military and vets move on DC starting now.
Militias facilitate and augment this activity.
Occupy every major road along fed buildings and the campus of fed buildings by the hundreds of thousands.
Lock the highways around down with semis right after everybody gets in.
Hold until the purge is complete.
Try peaceful means first, but be prepared to fight to get the Dems out of the fed government and military by any means necessary. They all must go and a hard reset must occur for our country to avoid collapse.
We must end the war in Ukraine with negotiated settlement. It is the only way.
Focus on strength and winning. Masculinity is good and men must be leaders. Strength is a deterrent and fear is the product.
Stop obsessing over diversity. We are all diverse and DEI is a cancer.
Thankfully we rejected the DEI candidate and will have a real President instead of Weekend at Bernie’s.
Consider this last sunset of ‘24 and my actions the end of our sickness and a new chapter of health for our people. Rally around the Trump, Musk, Kennedy, and ride this wave to the highest hegemony for all Americans! We are second to no one.
I got all that from a rented Cybertruck exploding with fireworks in front of a Trump Hotel in Vegas by a guy who shot himself. Didn’t you?
I’m tempted to analyze this as Romanticism run amok: individuals imagining they are the center of the universe. But frankly, it’s just sad, these people do estranged from the rest of us they think their actions speak to us, when we don’t even know who they are. Or what they’re talking about.
Miller: He's going to rip up those agreements that allows those workers to “work” from home… we all know what the federal workers are really doing is absolutely nothing.. he's also going to say that workers who betrayed the trust of the American people are going to be fired. pic.twitter.com/oYdylDtuWk
The article is not a law review article on the topic, but the Pendleton Act of 1883 established the Civil Service, replacing the spoils system which had existed before. (Trump, in essence, wants to return to the spoils system.) The Pendleton Act was modified in 1978, to exempt from civil service anyone "whose position has been determined to be of a confidential, policy-determining, policy-making or policy-advocating character.” That has been interpreted as applying only to noncareer political appointments for the term of the administration. Such people are essentially “at will” employees.
Trump wants to use that loophole to place all civil service employees on Schedule F, so they could be fired at will. The law, however, doesn’t work that way.
This position … flies in the face of a canon of statutory interpretation that statutes should be read in a way that makes sense. If an interpretation of a law carves out an exception so large that it makes the law meaningless, that’s probably the wrong interpretation. That would be the case here: Reading the 1978 law in this way would effectively nullify the entire Pendleton Act.
....
In addition, firing 50,000 employees is a massive act that falls under the Supreme Court’s new “major questions” doctrine. [Trump’s interpretationA] is based on a very obscure, hitherto unnoticed provision of the law, it is a radical change from current practice, and it has a significant impact. This would mean, under conservative jurisprudence, that it is quasi-legislative in nature and not deserving of court deference. And as the late Justice Antonin Scalia memorably held, Congress “does not hide elephants in mouseholes.”
Giving the President the power to fire 50,000 employees at will is the definition of an elephant in a mouse hole. Trump’s order to put all civil service employees would run up against a regulation Biden just saw put into effect, one meant to keep Trump from changing all employees to Schedule F. It would take months to repeal that regulation. And if Trump did repeal the regulation, the effort to Schedule F all employees would be challenged in court, on the grounds I outlined (at least). It would probably spend a while there, and by that time Trump is facing a new Congress that might be inclined to further protect civil service workers.
And many of them do have contracts expressly allowing them to work from home. Trump can tear up copies of those contracts every day of his four year term. It won’t invalidate them.
Miller: He’s going to open up federal lands for drilling, for fracking, for clean coal and he is going to bring down the cost of energy. He's going to cut the price gasoline pic.twitter.com/oHoWfkvyQ7
That won’t happen, either. Biden already wrested control of the oil market from OPEC. Trump doesn’t understand that, and neither does Miller. Which means the price of gas is going to rise, not fall, unless Trump hires somebody who’ll explain it to him. Trump also tried to open federal lands to drilling once before. He didn’t get any takers. He won’t now, either.
I don't know where this came from. I found it in my archives, an unpublished draft from a few years ago. I decided to post it simply because of the reference to the cave as the place of the nativity (let the reader understand). That's a reference that doesn't appear in the canonical gospels, but first shows up in the Arabic Infancy Gospel. Tradition, contrary to the aim of the Puritans and their spiritual descendants, is not limited to the canonical scriptures. That alone seemed to make this worth posting.
One of the queerest spots on Earth — I hope — is the patch of planet where, according to tradition, a cave once stabled animals, and where Mary gave birth to a son whose later preaching — scholars of every stripe agree, with varying enthusiasm — caused the occupying Romans to crucify him. Generations of Christians have churched over the traditional Bethlehem spot to the highest degree. Centuries of additions have made the architecture peculiar, but no one can see the church anyway, because many monasteries clamp onto it in clusters like barnacles. The Greek Orthodox Church owns the grotto site now, in the form of the Church of the Nativity.
There, in the Church of the Nativity, I took worn stone stairways to descend to levels of dark rooms, chapels, and dungeonlike corridors where hushed people passed. The floors were black stone of cracked marble. Dense brocades hung down old stone walls. Oil lamps hung in layers. Each polished silver or brass lamp seemed to absorb more light than its orange flame emitted, so the more lamps shone, the darker the space.
Packed into a tiny, domed upper chamber, Norwegians sang, as every other group did in turn, a Christmas carol. The stone dome bounced the sound around. The people sounded like seraphs singing inside a bell, sore amazed.
Descending once more, I passed several monks, narrow men, fine-faced and black, who wore tall black hats and long black robes. Ethiopians, they use the oldest Christian rite. At a lower level, in a small room, I peered over half a stone wall and saw Europeans below; they whispered in a language I could not identify.
Distant music sounded deep, as if from within my ribs. The music was, in fact, people from all over the world in the upper chamber, singing harmonies in their various tongues. The music threaded the vaults.
Now I climbed down innumerable dark stone stairs to the main part, the deepest basement: The Grotto of the Nativity. The grotto was down yet another smoky stairway, at the back of a stone cave far beneath street level. This was the place. It smelled of wet sand. It was a narrow cave about ten feet wide; cracked marble paved it. Bunched tapers, bending grotesque in the heat, lighted a corner of floor. People had to kneel, one by one, under arches of brocade hangings, and stretch into a crouch down among dozens of gaudy hanging lamps, to see it.
A fourteen-pointed silver star, two feet in diameter, covered a raised bit of marble floor at the cave wall. This silver star was the X that marked the spot: Here, just here, the infant got born. Two thousand years of Christianity began here, where God empties himself into man. Actually, many Christian scholars think “Jesus of Nazareth” was likely born in Nazareth. Early writers hooked his birth to Bethlehem to fit a prophecy. Here, now, the burning oils smelled heavy. It must have struck many people that we were competing with these lamps for oxygen.
In the center of the silver star was a circular hold. That was the bull’s eye, God’s quondam target.
Crouching people leaned forward to wipe their fingers across the hole’s flat bottom. When it was my turn, I knelt, bent under a fringed sating drape, reached across half the silver star, and touched its hole. I could feel some sort of soft wax in it. The hole was a quarter inch deep and six inches across, like a wide petri dish. I have never read any theologian who claims that God is particularly interested in religion, anyway.
Any patch of ground anywhere smacks more of God’s presence on Earth, to me, than did this marble grotto. The ugliness of the blunt and bumpy silver star impressed me. The bathetic pomp of the heavy, tasseled brocades, the marble, the censers hanging from chains, the embroidered antependium, the aspergillum, the crosiers, the ornate lamps — some human’s idea of elegance — bespoke grand comedy, too, that God put up with it. And why should he not? Things here on Earth get a whole lot worse than bad taste.
“Every day,” said Rabbi Nachman of Bratslav, “the glory is ready to emerge from its debasement.”
What follows is not scholarship nor in any sense textual or historical analysis. At best it's literary criticism, the area I'm most trained in when it comes to written material like the infancy narratives. It's a seasonal bug of mine to write about this stuff. The bulk of this is an old post somewhat reworked, by which I mean I've removed the original introduction, and gotten straight to the point: the variety of infancy narratives in Christian history.
Not in Christianity, because most of these are unknown outside of seminaries and scholars. That may seem to make it "secret" knowledge, or even suppressed knowledge: but it's nothing of the sort. You can find this stuff on the internet; or in books like Raymond Brown's The Birth of the Messiah, a very mainstream Catholic (Brown was a priest) study; lots of places, really. It isn't "obscure", it's just not widely known. "Obscure" implies "hidden." But these narratives are only hidden from people either not interested in them, or afraid of them. On the other hand, they show up in folk songs that are technically as outside of Christianity as Christmas trees are; and yet they are so “traditional” the Church of the Nativity in Bethlehem is over a cave. So…
Let's start with a bit of history, just to provide context:
The Gospel of Mark is dated to around 70 C.E., and contains no mention of a nativity at all. Neither does The Gospel of John, which clocks in between 100 and 120 C.E.
The only story from the life of Jesus of Nazareth in Paul's letters is the reference to the eucharisto in Corinthians. Otherwise, Paul preaches "Christ crucified," which for Paul clearly is what made Jesus of Nazareth "Messiah" or Christos. Both terms better translate as “Anointed One.” It also means the "last supper" for Paul is a memorial meal; the metaphysics of it came much later. Although it raises the interesting question, again: what do the words of institution in Corinthians mean? But that is another question, isn’t it?
Matthew and Luke both have widely divergent nativity stories, which cannot be reconciled. In Matthew, Mary and Joseph live in Bethlehem, and the wise men come when Jesus is 2 or younger (because that's the age of the innocents slaughtered by Herod). The family flees to Egypt (recaptiulating Israel's history; in with Joseph, out with Moses), and comes back to settle in Nazareth.
In Luke, they live in Nazareth and go to Bethlehem for the census (for which there is no other record than in Luke's tale).
By John's gospel, metaphysics has taken over, and Jesus not only predates Creation, but is the shaping force of Creation (the logos of Greek philosophy is thus reconciled with the Creator of Hebraic belief). Birth is irrelevant to the Word, which exists, with God, prior to the beginning.
What does this mean?
Well, that the gospels are not history texts in the way the Greeks understood them, or even as we, after them, do.* They are, in seminary language, confessional documents. They confess a belief in the God of Abraham and Jesus, based on an experience that the communities which created these documents felt could best be expressed in this way. I learned all this in seminary, and yet I still sing "O Come, O Come Emmanuel" every December, still read Luke 2 in the King James Version every Christmas Eve, still believe in the songs of Mary and Zechariah and Simeon and the angels, and even in the dreams of Joseph. I know what it all means, and it all means something to me. I can exegete the Magnificat and the gifts of the Magi and even the journeys of the holy family and the visitation of shepherds. It’s all a part of my confession.
To that I would add this postscript: the fear some modern theologians have is that this is a rational age and Christianity is not "rational" enough for the age (the “problem” with Christianity is usually described as being too "metaphysical.") I'll accept that classical metaphysics is almost as dead as logical positivism (which is really well and truly dead, despite what Carnap's disciples say), but what is the material and physical explanation of love? If you can answer that without an absurdly reductio argument, I'd be interested. A professor told me once he read that Emmanuel Levinas, the philosopher of phenomenology, once witnessed a stranger rescue a young girl on a busy street from the traffic and an oncoming car. Why, Levinas wondered, would this happen? Levinas was no logical positivist or Anglo-American materialist; he worked on his own answers. But it's a profoundly simple question with no simple answer. So while I don't defend classical metaphysics, I don't toss out the baby with the bathwater. Not everything, at all, is material; or can be understood as such. Some things are "human nature," or just the "human psyche," and what is more metaphysical than that?
But more importantly, people don't ratiocinate about matters religious (or miraculous, or absolutely contrary to human experience, like a "virgin birth") nearly so much as some theologians (and non-theologians), imagine they do. Kierkegaard wrote (mockingly) of the young man who do objectively observed his own life he awoke one day to find he’d reasoned himself out of existence. No one, as he pointed out, stands apart from their own existence, nor can we explain it objectively. The same is true of religion.
Christianity won't die because people can't think about a virgin birth or a triune but monotheistic god. I, too, thought they should think more about such matters; they taught me otherwise. Pastors, even those with the briefest of careers, see the people in the church a bit differently. Close contact with reality will do that to you. I just had a note from a member of my first church, the one I pastored as a student. Almost thirty years on, he remembers my first sermon there because, he says, I painted (in words!) a picture of bluebonnets. And all I remember of those sermons was struggling to make my abstruse theological ideas understandable in a 15 minute monologue.
The point I’m trying to make is that Christianity is not nearly so fragile as "outsiders" believe; and to introduce the idea of the infancy narratives of Jesus aren't so singular and simple as, especially at this time of year, we often think. The following nativity gospels all post-date the canonical gospels; but they are interesting takes on the birth, and even childhood, of Jesus the Christ. What interests me are not the similarities, but the variations, and the way the details change, and then get cemented into place.
1. We find what follows in the book of Joseph the high priest, who lived in the time of Christ. Some say that he is Caiaphas. He has said that Jesus spoke, and, indeed, when He was lying in His cradle said to Mary His mother: I am Jesus, the Son of God, the Logos, whom you have brought forth, as the Angel Gabriel announced to you; and my Father has sent me for the salvation of the world.
2. In the three hundred and ninth year of the era of Alexander, Augustus put forth an edict, that every man should be enrolled in his native place. Joseph therefore arose, and taking Mary his spouse, went away to Jerusalem, and came to Bethlehem, to be enrolled along with his family in his native city. And having come to a cave, Mary told Joseph that the time of the birth was at hand, and that she could not go into the city; but, said she, let us go into this cave. This took place at sunset. And Joseph went out in haste to go for a woman to be near her. When, therefore, he was busy about that, he saw an Hebrew old woman belonging to Jerusalem, and said: Come hither, my good woman, and go into this cave, in which there is a woman near her time.
3. Wherefore, after sunset, the old woman, and Joseph with her, came to the cave, and they both went in. And, behold, it was filled with lights more beautiful than the gleaming of lamps and candles, and more splendid than the light of the sun. The child, enwrapped in swaddling clothes, was sucking the breast of the Lady Mary His mother, being placed in a stall. And when both were wondering at this light, the old woman asks the Lady Mary: Are you the mother of this Child? And when the Lady Mary gave her assent, she says: You are not at all like the daughters of Eve. The Lady Mary said: As my son has no equal among children, so his mother has no equal among women. The old woman replied: My mistress, I came to get payment; I have been for a long time affected with palsy. Our mistress the Lady Mary said to her: Place your hands upon the child. And the old woman did so, and was immediately cured. Then she went forth, saying: Henceforth I will be the attendant and servant of this child all the days of my life.
4. Then came shepherds; and when they had lighted a fire, and were rejoicing greatly, there appeared to them the hosts of heaven praising and celebrating God Most High. And while the shepherds were doing the same, the cave was at that time made like a temple of the upper world, since both heavenly and earthly voices glorified and magnified God on account of the birth of the Lord Christ. And when that old Hebrew woman saw the manifestation of those miracles, she thanked God, saying: I give You thanks, O God, the God of Israel, because my eyes have seen the birth of the Saviour of the world.
....
7. And it came to pass, when the Lord Jesus was born at Bethlehem of Judæa, in the time of King Herod, behold, magi came from the east to Jerusalem, as Zeraduscht had predicted; and there were with them gifts, gold, and frankincense, and myrrh. And they adored Him, and presented to Him their gifts. Then the Lady Mary took one of the swaddling-bands, and, on account of the smallness of her means, gave it to them; and they received it from her with the greatest marks of honour. And in the same hour there appeared to them an angel in the form of that star which had before guided them on their journey; and they went away, following the guidance of its light, until they arrived in their own country.
8. And their kings and chief men came together to them, asking what they had seen or done, how they had gone and come back, what they had brought with them. And they showed them that swathing-cloth which the Lady Mary had given them. Wherefore they celebrated a feast, and, according to their custom, lighted a fire and worshipped it, and threw that swathing-cloth into it; and the fire laid hold of it, and enveloped it. And when the fire had gone out, they took out the swathing-cloth exactly as it had been before, just as if the fire had not touched it. Wherefore they began to kiss it, and to put it on their heads and their eyes, saying: This verily is the truth without doubt. Assuredly it is a great thing that the fire was not able to burn or destroy it. Then they took it, and with the greatest honour laid it up among their treasures.
This apocryphal gospel goes on to describe Jesus' early life, where he performs various miracles, including making a dead boy speak and tell who pushed the dead boy from the roof (which is why he's dead; all the other boys accuse Jesus). I mention this only because the story shows elements both from Matthew's infancy narrative, and from Luke's. Luke is the only gospel that gives us a glimpse of Jesus as a young boy (in the Temple, teaching the elders). The Arabic infancy gospel expands on those stories, echoing Luke to lend these stories authenticity. It even echoes Luke’s Nunc Dimmitus. This should not be a surprise. Even today we have a "canon" which fictional characters must follow, be the character James Bond or Dr. Who or just in the comic books. The non-canonical part is the introduction of a cave as the birthplace. But that becomes “canonical” in the other nativity stories.
The Arabic gospel also elaborates on the years the Holy Family spent in Egypt. Basically it mashes together the nativities of Matthew and Luke, then relates the adventures of the Family in Egypt as they pass through villages, a hospital, fall into the hands of robbers, and generally pass the time until they move back to Nazareth. I mean no disrespect, but this gospel clearly builds a narrative from oral traditions and other sources, like the Infancy Gospel of Thomas (see below). Several of the stories about Jesus making clay birds fly and making kids drop dead appear in both gospels, but the Arabic gospel includes every version of a story that it can, and several not found anywhere else. While Jesus is still an infant, just his cleaned clothes exorcise demons from a boy who touches them, and water he is bathed in has healing powers. The gospel seems intent on establishing the divinity of the Christchild in ways that go far beyond the witness of Matthew or Luke, but clearly rely on those two gospels as the starting place. And then there’s that cave….
That's the other interesting bit, for our purposes, in this nativity story: the reference to a cave as the birthplace of the Christ child. I can't tell you where this idea comes from, but it persists in the narratives that follow, which is a curious thing in itself. In fact, it’s so persistent the site of the nativity in Bethlehem today is taken to be a cave.
Picking up on this desire for stories about Jesus as a child, the Infancy Gospel of Thomas (written around 140-170 CE) plunges right in. No birth, no cave, no adventures in Egypt; just Jesus among the children :
2. This child Jesus, when five years old, was playing in the ford of a mountain stream; and He collected the flowing waters into pools, and made them clear immediately, and by a word alone He made them obey Him. And having made some soft clay, He fashioned out of it twelve sparrows. And it was the Sabbath when He did these things. And there were also many other children playing with Him. And a certain Jew, seeing what Jesus was doing, playing on the Sabbath, went off immediately, and said to his father Joseph: Behold, thy son is at the stream, and has taken clay, and made of it twelve birds, and has profaned the Sabbath. And Joseph, coming to the place and seeing, cried out to Him, saying: Wherefore doest thou on the Sabbath what it is not lawful to do? And Jesus clapped His hands, and cried out to the sparrows, and said to them: Off you go! And the sparrows flew, and went off crying. And the Jews seeing this were amazed, and went away and reported to their chief men what they had seen Jesus doing.
3. And the son of Annas the scribe was standing there with Joseph; and he took a willow branch, and let out the waters which Jesus bad collected. And Jesus, seeing what was done, was angry, and said to him: O wicked, impious, and foolish! what harm did the pools and the waters do to thee? Behold, even now thou shalt be dried up like a tree, and thou shalt not bring forth either leaves, or root, or fruit. And straightway that boy was quite dried up. And Jesus departed, and went to Joseph's house. But the parents of the boy that had been dried up took him up, bewailing his youth, and brought him to Joseph, and reproached him because, said they, thou hast such a child doing such things.
4. After that He was again passing through the village; and a boy ran up against Him, and struck His shoulder. And Jesus was angry, and said to him: Thou shalt not go back the way thou camest. And immediately he fell down dead. And some who saw what had taken place, said: Whence was this child begotten, that every word of his is certainly accomplished? And the parents of the dead boy went away to Joseph, and blamed him, saying: Since thou hast such a child, it is impossible for thee to live with us in the village; or else teach him to bless, and not to curse: for he is killing our children.
This Jesus does not play well with others:
8. And when the Jews were encouraging Zacchaeus, the child laughed aloud, and said: Now let thy learning bring forth fruit, and let the blind in heart see. I am here from above, that I may curse them, and call them to the things that are above, as He that sent me on your account has commanded me. And when the child ceased speaking, immediately all were made whole who had fallen under His curse. And no one after that dared to make Him angry, lest He should curse him, and he should be maimed.
But he gets better:
9. And some days after, Jesus was playing in an upper room of a certain house, and one of the children that were playing with Him fell down from the house, and was killed. And, when the other children saw this, they ran away, and Jesus alone stood still. And the parents of the dead child coming, reproached...and they threatened Him. And Jesus leaped down from the roof, and stood beside the body of the child, and cried with a loud voice, and said: Zeno-for that was his name-stand up, and tell me; did I throw thee down? And he stood up immediately, and said: Certainly not, my lord; thou didst not throw me down, but hast raised me up. And those that saw this were struck with astonishment. And the child's parents glorified God on account of the miracle that had happened, and adored Jesus.
10. A few days after, a young man was splitting wood in the corner, and the axe came down and cut the sole of his foot in two, and he died from loss of blood. And there was a great commotion, and people ran together, and the child Jesus ran there too. And He pressed through the crowd, and laid hold of the young man's wounded foot, and he was cured immediately. And He said to the young man: Rise up now, split the wood, and remember me. And the crowd seeing what had happened, adored the child, saying: Truly the Spirit of God dwells in this child.
11. And when He was six years old, His mother gave Him a pitcher, and sent Him to draw water, and bring it into the house. But He struck against some one in the crowd, and the pitcher was broken. And Jesus unfolded the cloak which He had on, and filled it with water, and carried it to His mother. And His mother, seeing the miracle that had happened, kissed Him, and kept within herself the mysteries which she had seen Him doing.
12. And again in seed-time the child went out with His father to sow corn in their land. And while His father was sowing, the child Jesus also sowed one gain of corn. And when He had reaped it, and threshed it, He made a hundred kors; and calling all the poor of the village to the threshing-floor, He gave them the corn, and Joseph took away what was left of the corn. And He was eight years old when He did this miracle.
13. And His father was a carpenter, and at that time made ploughs and yokes. And a certain rich man ordered him to make him a couch. And one of what is called the cross pieces being too short, they did not know what to do. The child Jesus said to His father Joseph: Put down the two pieces of wood, and make them even in the middle. And Joseph did as the child said to him. And Jesus stood at the other end, and took hold of the shorter piece of wood, and stretched it, and made it equal to the other. And His father Joseph saw it, and wondered, and embraced the child, and blessed Him, saying: Blessed am I, because God has given me this child.
14. And Joseph, seeing that the child was vigorous in mind and body, again resolved that He should not remain ignorant of the letters, and took Him away, and handed Him over to another teacher. And the teacher said to Joseph: I shall first teach him the Greek letters, and then the Hebrew. For the teacher was aware of the trial that had been made of the child, and was afraid of Him. Nevertheless he wrote out the alphabet, and gave Him all his attention for a long time, and He made him no answer. And Jesus said to him: If thou art really a teacher, and art well acquainted with the letters, tell me the power of the Alpha, and I will tell thee the power of the Beta. And the teacher was enraged at this, and struck Him on the head. And the child, being in pain, cursed him; and immediately he swooned away, and fell to the ground on his face. And the child returned to Joseph's house; and Joseph was grieved, and gave orders to His mother, saying: Do not let him go outside of the door, because those that make him angry die.
15. And after some time, another master again, a genuine friend of Joseph, said to him: Bring the child to my school; perhaps I shall be able to flatter him into learning his letters. And Joseph said: If thou hast the courage, brother, take him with thee. And he took Him with him in fear and great agony; but the child went along pleasantly. And going boldly into the school, He found a book lying on the reading-desk; and taking it, He read not the letters that were in it, but opening His mouth, He spoke by the Holy Spirit, and taught the law to those that were standing round. And a great crowd having come together, stood by and heard Him, and wondered at the ripeness of His teaching, and the readiness of His words, and that He, child as He was, spoke in such a way. And Joseph hearing of it, was afraid, and ran to the school, in doubt lest his master too should be without experience. And the master said to Joseph: Know, brother, that I have taken the child as a scholar, and he is full of much grace and wisdom; but I beseech thee, brother, take him home. And when the child heard this, He laughed at him directly, and said: Since thou hast spoken aright, and witnessed aright, for thy sake he also that was struck down shall be cured. And immediately the other master was cured. And Joseph took the child, and went away home.
16. And Joseph sent his son James to tie up wood and bring it home, and the child Jesus also followed him. And when James was gathering the fagots, a viper bit James' hand. And when he was racked with pain, and at the point of death, Jesus came near and blew upon the bite; and the pain ceased directly, and the beast burst, and instantly James remained safe and sound.
17. And after this the infant of one of Joseph's neighbours fell sick and died, and its mother wept sore. And Jesus heard that there was great lamentation and commotion, and ran in haste, and found the child dead, and touched his breast, and said: I say to thee, child, be not dead, but live, and be with thy mother. And directly it looked up and laughed. And He said to the woman: Take it, and give it milk, and remember me. And seeing this, the crowd that was standing by wondered, and said: Truly this child was either God or an angel of God, for every word of his is a certain fact. And Jesus went out thence, playing with the other children.
18. And some time after there occurred a great commotion while a house was building, and Jesus stood up and went away to the place. And seeing a man lying dead, He took him by the hand, and said: Man, I say to thee, arise, and go on with thy work. And directly he rose up, and adored Him. And seeing this, the crowd wondered, and said: This child is from heaven, for he has saved many souls from death, and he continues to save during all his life.
19. And when He was twelve years old His parents went as usual to Jerusalem to the feast of the passover with their fellow-travellers. And after the passover they were coming home again. And while they were coming home, the child Jesus went back to Jerusalem. And His parents thought that He was in the company. And having gone one day's journey, they sought for Him among their relations; and not finding Him, they were in great grief, and turned back to the city seeking for Him. And after the third day they found Him in the temple, sitting in the midst of the teachers, both hearing the law and asking them questions. And they were all attending to Him, and wondering that He, being a child, was shutting the mouths of the elders and teachers of the people, explaining the main points of the law and the parables of the prophets. And His mother Mary coming up, said to Him: Why hast thou done this to us, child? Behold, we have been seeking for thee in great trouble. And Jesus said to them: Why do you seek me? Do you not know that I must be about my Father's business? And the scribes and the Pharisees said: Art thou the mother of this child? And she said: I am. And they said to her: Blessed art thou among women, for God hath blessed the fruit of thy womb; for such glory, and such virtue and wisdom, we have neither seen nor heard ever. And Jesus rose up, and followed His mother, and was subject to His parents. And His mother observed all these things that had happened. And Jesus advanced in wisdom, and stature, and grace. To whom be glory for ever and ever. Amen.
Infancy Thomas connects up with Luke in the end, meaning largely to fill the gap between the story of Simeon and the child teaching the elders. With some miracle stories that can’t exactly be called “miraculous” thrown in.
The other infancy gospel is generally dated again around 140-170 CE, is the Infancy Gospel of James (a/k/a Protevangelium of James). This work also betrays familiarity with the canonical gospel accounts. But it does some interesting things with point of view, while shifting the location of the birth from Bethlehem to the desert. Like Matthew’s version, it centers on Joseph, not Mary. It even tries to combine the two: there is a census, but Joseph is ashamed of his pregnant wife. And in that desert there is again a cave.
Chapter 17
(1) Then, there was an order from the Emperor Augustus to register how many people were in Bethlehem of Judea. (2) And Joseph said, "I will register my sons. But this child? What will I do about him? How will I register him? (3) And my wife? Oh, I am ashamed. Should I register her as my daughter? The children of Israel know that she is not my daughter. (4) This day, I will do as the Lord wants."
(5) And he saddled his donkey and sat her on it and his son led and Samuel followed. (6) And they arrived at the third mile and Joseph turned and saw that she was sad. (7) And he said to himself, "Perhaps the child within her is troubling her." (8) And again Joseph turned around and saw her laughing and said to her, "Mary, what is with you? First your face appears happy and then sad?"
(9) And she said, "Joseph, it is because I see two people with my eyes, one crying and being afflicted, one rejoicing and being extremely happy."
(10) When they came to the middle of the journey, Mary said to him, "Joseph, take me off the donkey, the child pushing from within me to let him come out."
(11) So he took her off the donkey and said to her, "Where will I take you and shelter you in your awkwardness? This area is a desert."
Chapter 18
(1) And he found a cave and led her there and stationed his sons to watch her, (2) while he went to a find a Hebrew midwife in the land of Bethlehem.
(3) Then, Joseph wandered, but he did not wander. (4) And I looked up to the peak of the sky and saw it standing still and I looked up into the air. With utter astonishment I saw it, even the birds of the sky were not moving. (5) And I looked at the ground and saw a bowl lying there and workers reclining. And their hands were in the bowl. (6) And chewing, they were not chewing. And picking food up, they were not picking it up. And putting food in their mouths, they were not putting it in their mouths. (7) Rather, all their faces were looking up.
(8) And I saw sheep being driven, but the sheep were standing still. (9) And the shepherd lifted up his hand to strike them, but his hand remained above them. (10) And I saw the rushing current of the river and I saw goats and their mouths resting in the water, but they were not drinking. (11) And suddenly everything was replaced by the ordinary course of events.
....
Chapter 20
(1) And the midwife went in and said, "Mary, position yourself, for not a small test concerning you is about to take place."
(2) When Mary heard these things, she positioned herself. And Salome inserted her finger into her body. (3) And Salome cried out and said, "Woe for my lawlessness and the unbelief that made me test the living God. Look, my hand is falling away from me and being consumed in fire."
(5) And Salome dropped to her knees before the Lord, saying, "God of Abraham and Isaac and Jacob, (6) do not expose me to the children of Israel, but give me back to the poor. (7) For you know, Lord, that I have performed service and received my wage from you."
(8) Suddenly, an angel of the Lord appeared, saying to her, "Salome, Salome, the Lord of all has heard your entreaty. (9) Stretch out your hand to the child and lift him up and he will be salvation and joy for you."
(10) And Salome went to the child and lifted him up, saying, "I worship him because he has been born a king to Israel." (11) And at once Salome was healed and left the cave justified.
(12) Suddenly, there was a voice saying, "Salome, Salome, do not proclaim what a miracle you have seen until the child comes to Jerusalem."
You’ll find some similarities there, and in the section from the Apocalypse to John (below), to the Ted Hughes poem “Minstrel’s Song.” I’m pretty sure Hughes knew the scriptural passage; I can’t say he also knew the Protevangelium. But describing dreams in the voice of the character is an old narrative technique, and it’s interesting how effective it is in both works.
The striking part of this account is the focus on Mary. Luke’s gospel starts with Gabriel announcing the conception of John the Baptizer. This gospel isn’t interested in filling in the story of the young Jesus; it backs all the way up to the conception of Mary, the mother of Jesus. The Infancy Gospel of James starts with the lament of Anna that she is childless. This is answered by the announcement that she will have a child: Marry, who is no longer just a young girl (Isaiah’s promise), but born to be the Holy mother. This never became canon, but it did eventually become Christian doctrine. Maybe because, again, this gospel repeats parts of Matthew and Luke:
And her parents went down marvelling, and praising the Lord God, because the child had not turned back. And Mary was in the temple of the Lord as if she were a dove that dwelt there, and she received food from the hand of an angel. And when she was twelve years old there was held a council of the priests, saying: Behold, Mary has reached the age of twelve years in the temple of the Lord. What then shall we do with her, test perchance she defile the sanctuary of the Lord? And they said to the high priest: Thou standest by the altar of the Lord; go in, and pray concerning her; and whatever the Lord shall manifest unto thee, that also will we do. And the high priest went in, taking the robe with the twelve bells into the holy of holies; and he prayed concerning her. And behold an angel of the Lord stood by him, saying unto him: Zacharias, Zacharias, go out and assemble the widowers of the people, and let them bring each his rod; and to whomsoever the Lord shall show a sign, his wife shall she be. And the heralds went out through all the circuit of Judaea, and the trumpet of the Lord sounded, and all ran.
9. And Joseph, throwing away his axe, went out to meet them; and when they had assembled, they went away to the high priest, taking with them their rods. And he, taking the rods of all of them, entered into the temple, and prayed; and having ended his prayer, he took the rods and came out, and gave them to them: but there was no sign in them, and Joseph took his rod last; and, behold, a dove came out of the rod, and flew upon Joseph's head. And the priest said to Joseph, Thou hast been chosen by lot to take into thy keeping the virgin of the Lord. But Joseph refused, saying: I have children, and I am an old man, and she is a young girl. I am afraid lest I become a laughing-stock to the sons of Israel. And the priest said to Joseph: Fear the Lord thy God, and remember what the Lord did to Dathan, and Abiram, and Korah; how the earth opened, and they were swallowed up on account of their contradiction. And now fear, O Joseph, lest the same things happen in thy house. And Joseph was afraid, and took her into his keeping. And Joseph said to Mary: Behold, I have received thee from the temple of the Lord; and now I leave thee in my house, and go away to build my buildings, and I shall come to thee. The Lord will protect thee.
10. And there was a council of the priests, saying: Let us make a veil for the temple of the Lord. And the priest said: Call to me the undefiled virgins of the family of David. And the officers went away, and sought, and found seven virgins. And the priest remembered the child Mary, that she was of the family of David, and undefiled before God. And the officers went away and brought her. And they brought them into the temple of the Lord. And the priest said: Choose for me by lot who shall spin the gold, and the white, and the fine linen, and the silk, and the blue, and the scarlet, and the true purple. And the true purple and the scarlet fell to the lot of Mary, and she took them, and went away to her house. And at that time Zacharias was dumb, and Samuel was in his place until the time that Zacharias spake. And Mary took the scarlet, and span it.
11. And she took the pitcher, and went out to fill it with water. And, behold, a voice saying: Hail, thou who hast received grace; the Lord is with thee; blessed art thou among women! And she looked round, on the right hand and on the left, to see whence this voice came. And she went away, trembling, to her house, and put down the pitcher; and taking the purple, she sat down on her seat, and drew it out. And, behold, an angel of the Lord stood before her, saying: Fear not, Mary; for thou hast found grace before the Lord of all, and thou shalt conceive, according to His word. And she hearing, reasoned with herself, saying: Shall I conceive by the Lord, the living God? and shall I bring forth as every woman brings forth? And the angel of the Lord said: Not so, Mary; for the power of the Lord shall overshadow thee: wherefore also that holy thing which shall be born of thee shall be called the Son of the Most High. And thou shalt call His name Jesus, for He shall save His people from their sins. And Mary said: Behold, the servant of the Lord before His face: let it be unto me according to thy word.
12. And she made the purple and the scarlet, and took them to the priest. And the priest blessed her, and said: Mary, the Lord God hath magnified thy name, and thou shall be blessed in all the generations of the earth. And Mary, with great joy, went away to Elizabeth her kinswoman, and knocked at the door. And when Elizabeth heard her, she threw away the scarlet, and ran to the door, and opened it; and seeing Mary, she blessed her, and said: Whence is this to me, that the mother of my Lord should come to me? for, behold, that which is in me leaped and blessed thee. But Mary had forgotten the mysteries of which the archangel Gabriel had spoken, and gazed up into heaven, and said: Who am I, O Lord, that all the generations of the earth should bless me? And she remained three months with Elizabeth; and day by day she grew bigger. And Mary being afraid, went away to her own house, and hid herself from the sons of Israel. And she was sixteen years old when these mysteries happened.
13. And she was in her sixth month; and, behold, Joseph came back from his building, and, entering into his house, he discovered that she was big with child. And he smote his face, and threw himself on the ground upon the sackcloth, and wept bitterly, saying: With what face shall I look upon the Lord my God? and what prayer shall I make about this maiden? because I received her a virgin out of the temple of the Lord, and I have not watched over her. Who is it that has hunted me down? Who has done this evil thing in my house, and defiled the virgin? Has not the history of Adam been repeated in me? For just as Adam was in the hour of his singing praise, and the serpent came, and found Eve alone, and completely deceived her, so it has happened to me also. And Joseph stood up from the sackcloth, and called Mary, and said to her: O thou who hast been cared for by God, why hast thou done this and forgotten the Lord thy God? Why hast thou brought low thy soul, thou that wast brought up in the holy of holies, and that didst receive food from the hand of an angel? And she wept bitterly, saying: I am innocent, and have known no man. And Joseph said to her: Whence then is that which is in thy womb? And she said: As the Lord my God liveth, I do not know whence it is to me.
14. And Joseph was greatly afraid, and retired from her, and considered what he should do in regard to her. And Joseph said: If I conceal her sin, I find myself fighting against the law of the Lord; and if I expose her to the sons of Israel, I am afraid lest that which is in her be from an angel, and I shall be found giving up innocent blood to the doom of death. What then shall I do with her? I will put her away from me secretly. And night came upon him; and, behold, an angel of the Lord appears to him in a dream, saying: Be not afraid for this maiden, for that which is in her is of the Holy Spirit; and she will bring forth a Son, and thou shall call His name Jesus, for He will save His people from their sins. And Joseph arose from sleep, and glorified the God of Israel, who had given him this grace; and he kept her.
15. And Annas the scribe came to him, and said: Why hast thou not appeared in our assembly? And Joseph said to him: Because I was weary from my journey, and rested the first day. And he turned, and saw that Mary was with child. And he ran away to the priest? and said to him: Joseph, whom thou didst vouch for, has committed a grievous crime. And the priest said: How so? And he said: He has defiled the virgin whom he received out of the temple of the Lord, and has married her by stealth, and has not revealed it to the sons of Israel. And the priest answering, said: Has Joseph done this? Then said Annas the scribe: Send officers, and thou wilt find the virgin with child. And the officers went away, and found it as he had said; and they brought her along with Joseph to the tribunal. And the priest said: Mary, why hast thou done this? and why hast thou brought thy soul low, and forgotten the Lord thy God? Thou that wast reared in the holy of holies, and that didst receive food from the hand of an angel, and didst hear the hymns, and didst dance before Him, why hast thou done this? And she wept bitterly, saying: As the Lord my God liveth, I am pure before Him, and know not a man. And the priest said to Joseph: Why hast thou done this? And Joseph said: As the Lord liveth, I am pure concerning her. Then said the priest: Bear not false witness, but speak the truth. Thou hast married her by stealth, and hast not revealed it to the sons of Israel, and hast not bowed thy head under the strong hand, that thy seed might be blessed. And Joseph was silent.
16. And the priest said: Give up the virgin whom thou didst receive out of the temple of the Lord. And Joseph burst into tears. And the priest said: I will give you to drink of the water of the ordeal of the Lord, and He shall make manifest your sins in your eyes. And the priest took the water, and gave Joseph to drink and sent him away to the hill-country; and he returned unhurt. And he gave to Mary also to drink, and sent her away to the hill-country; and she returned unhurt. And all the people wondered that sin did not appear in them. And the priest said: If the Lord God has not made manifest your sins, neither do I judge you. And he sent them away. And Joseph took Mary, and went away to his own house, rejoicing and glorifying the God of Israel
Here the elaboration is mostly on Matthew’s story, this time with an emphasis on Mary’s perpetual virginity.
There are also characters here, and a conversation between Joseph and Mary. This version probably gave license and material for the mystery plays in medieval England, which added characters to the nativity and made the shepherds comic figures. We’ve continued this, too: Amahl and the night visitors; La Befana, in Italy; the 3 Magi who became men of different ethnicities (the original DEI?). Even the little drummer π₯ boy.
And there’s always the cave. Several retellings of the nativity story from the medieval era on often place the birth of Christ in a cave. I have memories of nativity scenes set in a grotto rather than a barn or a stall. I think there were even sets for household use sold with a cave as the backdrop, rather than a stable. (In fact I know of one from a pottery company in Louisville, Kentucky.) We've lost the source of that echo, but we still hear the echo. The earliest reference seems to be from Justin Martyr, in his Dialogue with Trypho, a very early work of Christian apologetics:
"Now this king Herod, at the time when the Magi came to him from Arabia, and said they knew from a star which appeared in the heavens that a King had been born in your country, and that they had come to worship Him, learned from the elders of your people that it was thus written regarding Bethlehem in the prophet: 'And thou, Bethlehem, in the land of Judah, art by no means least among the princes of Judah; for out of thee shall go forth the leader who shall feed my people.' Accordingly the Magi from Arabia came to Bethlehem and worshipped the Child, and presented Him with gifts, gold and frankincense, and myrrh; but returned not to Herod, being warned in a revelation after worshipping the Child in Bethlehem. And Joseph, the spouse of Mary, who wished at first to put away his betrothed Mary, supposing her to be pregnant by intercourse with a man, i.e., from fornication, was commanded in a vision not to put away his wife; and the angel who appeared to him told him that what is in her womb is of the Holy Ghost. Then he was afraid, and did not put her away; but on the occasion of the first census which was taken in Judea, under Cyrenius, he went up from Nazareth, where he lived, to Bethlehem, to which he belonged, to be enrolled; for his family was of the tribe of Judah, which then inhabited that region. Then along with Mary he is ordered to proceed into Egypt, and remain there with the Child until another revelation warn them to return into Judah. But when the Child was born in Bethlehem, since Joseph could not find a lodging in that village, he took up his quarters in a certain cave near the village; and while they were there Mary brought forth the Christ and placed Him in a manger, and here the Magi who came from Arabia found Him. I have repeated to you," I continued, "what Isaiah foretold about the sign which foreshadowed the cave; but for the sake of those who have come with us to-day, I shall again remind you of the passage." Then I repeated the passage from Isaiah which I have already written, adding that, by means of those words, those who presided over the mysteries of Mithras were stirred up by the devil to say that in a place, called among them a cave, they were initiated by him. "[Chapter 78]
A mix, again, of Luke and Matthew, but with the birth relocated to a cave. A cave with a feeding trough. But now the Magi come from Arabia, which is interesting specificity. It was popular once to connect Christianity and Mithraism. It seems that supposed connection is quite old (this dialogue is an apologetic), which may explain the origins of the cave in the nativity stories.
It’s also interesting how the Matthean nativity dominates in these versions. Joseph is prominent, Mary much less so; there are references to Egypt, if not the flight there; and the Magi. Except for them, we tend to favor Luke’s version now. Tastes change.
Origen also puts the birth in a cave, and notes the location is still known, which he offers as proof of the veracity of the story.
CHAP. LI.
Now the Scripture speaks, respecting the place of the Saviour's birth--that the Ruler was to come forth from Bethlehem--in the following manner: "And thou Bethlehem, house of Ephrata, art not the least among the thousands of Judah: for out of thee shall He come forth unto Me who is to be Ruler in Israel; and His goings forth have been of old, from everlasting." Now this prophecy could not suit any one of those who, as Celsus' Jew says, were fanatics and mob-leaders, and who gave out that they had come from heaven, unless it were clearly shown that He had been born in Bethlehem, or, as another might say, had come forth from Bethlehem to be the leader of the people. With respect to the birth of Jesus in Bethlehem, if any one desires, after the prophecy of Micah and after the history recorded in the Gospels by the disciples of Jesus, to have additional evidence from other sources, let him know that, in conformity with the narrative in the Gospel regarding His birth, there is shown at Bethlehem the cave where He was born, and the manger in the cave where He was wrapped in swaddling-clothes. And this sight is greatly talked of in surrounding places, even among the enemies of the faith, it being said that in this cave was born that Jesus who is worshipped and reverenced by the Christians. Moreover, I am of opinion that, before the advent of Christ, the chief priests and scribes of the people, on account of the distinctness and clearness of this prophecy, taught that in Bethlehem the Christ was to be born. And this opinion had prevailed also extensively among the Jews; for which reason it is related that Herod, on inquiring at the chief priests and scribes of the people, heard from them that the Christ was to be born in Bethlehem of Judea, "whence David was." It is stated also in the Gospel according to John, that the Jews declared that the Christ was to be born in Bethlehem, "whence David was." But after our Lord's coming, those who busied themselves with overthrowing the belief that the place of His birth had been the subject of prophecy from the beginning, withheld such teaching from the people; acting in a similar manner to those individuals who won over those soldiers of the guard stationed around the tomb who had seen Him arise from the dead, and who instructed these eye-witnesses to report as follows: "Say that His disciples, while we slept, came and stole Him away. And if this come to the governor's ears, we shall persuade him, and secure you."
No Mithra this time, but a cave and a great deal more interest in establishing authorities in order to establish the authority and veracity of the infancy narrative. A very Matthean take, in other words. But there is one other nativity story in the canon, one that captures not what happened, but what it meant. From the Revelation to John:
A great sign appeared in the sky, a woman clothed with the sun, with the moon under her feet, and on her head a crown of twelve stars.
She was with child and wailed aloud in pain as she labored to give birth.
Then another sign appeared in the sky; it was a huge red dragon, with seven heads and ten horns, and on its heads were seven diadems.
Its tail swept away a third of the stars in the sky and hurled them down to the earth. Then the dragon stood before the woman about to give birth, to devour her child when she gave birth.
She gave birth to a son, a male child, destined to rule all the nations with an iron rod. Her child was caught up to God and his throne.
The woman herself fled into the desert where she had a place prepared by God, that there she might be taken care of for twelve hundred and sixty days.
Then war broke out in heaven; Michael and his angels battled against the dragon. The dragon and its angels fought back,
but they did not prevail and there was no longer any place for them in heaven.
The huge dragon, the ancient serpent, who is called the Devil and Satan, who deceived the whole world, was thrown down to earth, and its angels were thrown down with it.
Then I heard a loud voice in heaven say: "Now have salvation and power come, and the kingdom of our God and the authority of his Anointed. For the accuser of our brothers is cast out, who accuses them before our God day and night.
They conquered him by the blood of the Lamb and by the word of their testimony; love for life did not deter them from death.
Therefore, rejoice, you heavens, and you who dwell in them. But woe to you, earth and sea, for the Devil has come down to you in great fury, for he knows he has but a short time."
When the dragon saw that it had been thrown down to the earth, it pursued the woman who had given birth to the male child.
But the woman was given the two wings of the great eagle, so that she could fly to her place in the desert, where, far from the serpent, she was taken care of for a year, two years, and a half-year.
The serpent, however, spewed a torrent of water out of his mouth after the woman to sweep her away with the current.
But the earth helped the woman and opened its mouth and swallowed the flood that the dragon spewed out of its mouth.
Then the dragon became angry with the woman and went off to wage war against the rest of her offspring, those who keep God's commandments and bear witness to Jesus.
It took its position on the sand of the sea.
John’s vision and version have the virtue of capturing the truly revolutionary, truly apocalyptic (in terms of revelation) aspect of the nativity stories. Rather like a modern day CGI laden movie, he makes vivid and visual what the other stories merely suggest. Sometimes subtlety is nice; but sometimes, you want the spectacle.
I have to add here a brief review of The Gospel of Pseudo-Matthew. Curiosly, this recapitulates much of the Protevangelium, as both concern “The Birth of Mary the Holy Mother of God,
and Very Glorious Mother of Jesus Christ." It also takes many of the infancy stories from the Infancy Gospel of Thomas. It ends up basically being the Arabic gospel along with the Protevangelium. The interesting distinctions are the stories of Jesus’ childhood, some of which follow the accounts of the Arabic Infancy Gospel; but some of which are quite original and have made their way into our Christmas traditions. This will give you an idea of how it mixes Matthew, Luke, and the folk tales of the cave:
And when he had thus said, the angel ordered the beast to stand, for the time when she should bring forth was at hand; and he commanded the blessed Mary to come down off the animal, and go into a recess under a cavern, in which there never was light, but always darkness, because the light of day could not reach it. And when the blessed Mary had gone into it, it began to shine with as much brightness as if it were the sixth hour of the day. The light from God so shone in the cave, that neither by day nor night was light wanting as long as the blessed Mary was there. And there she brought forth a son, and the angels surrounded Him when He was being born. And as soon as He was born, He stood upon His feet, and the angels adored Him, saying: Glory to God in the highest, and on earth peace to men of good pleasure. Now, when the birth of the Lord was at hand, Joseph had gone away to seek midwives. And when he had found them, he returned to the cave, and found with Mary the infant which she had brought forth. And Joseph said to the blessed Mary: I have brought thee two midwives--Zelomi and Salome; and they are standing outside before the entrance to the cave, not daring to come in hither, because of the exceeding brightness. And when the blessed Mary heard this, she smiled; and Joseph said to her: Do not smile; but prudently allow them to visit thee, in case thou shouldst require them for thy cure. Then she ordered them to enter. And when Zelomi had come in, Salome having stayed without, Zelomi said to Mary: Allow me to touch thee. And when she had permitted her to make an examination, the midwife cried out with a loud voice, and said: Lord, Lord Almighty, mercy on us! It has never been heard or thought of, that any one should have her breasts full of milk, and that the birth of a son should show his mother to be a virgin. But there has been no spilling of blood in his birth, no pain in bringing him forth. A virgin has conceived, a virgin has brought forth, and a virgin she remains. And hearing these words, Salome said: Allow me to handle thee, and prove whether Zelomi have spoken the truth. And the blessed Mary allowed her to handle her. And when she had withdrawn her hand from handling her, it dried up, and through excess of pain she began to weep bitterly, and to be in great distress, crying out, and saying: O Lord God, Thou knowest that I have always feared Thee, and that without recompense I have cared for all the poor; I have taken nothing from the widow and the orphan, and the needy have I not sent empty away. And, behold, I am made wretched because of mine unbelief, since without a cause I wished to try Thy virgin.
And while she was thus speaking, there stood by her a young man in shining garments, saying: Go to the child, and adore Him, and touch Him with thy hand, and He will heal thee, because He is the Saviour of the world, and of all that hope in Him. And she went to the child with haste, and adored Him, and touched the fringe of the cloths in which He was wrapped, and instantly her hand was cured. And going forth, she began to cry aloud, and to tell the wonderful things which she had seen, and which she had suffered, and how she had been cured; so that many through her statements believed.
And some shepherds also affirmed that they had seen angels singing a hymn at midnight, praising and blessing the God of heaven, and saying: There has been born the Saviour of all, who is Christ the Lord, in whom salvation shall be brought back to Israel. Moreover, a great star, larger than any that had been seen since the beginning of the world, shone over the cave from the evening till the morning. And the prophets who were in Jerusalem said that this star pointed out the birth of Christ, who should restore the promise not only to Israel, but to all nations.
CHAP. 14.--And on the third day after the birth of our Lord Jesus Christ, the most blessed Mary went forth out of the cave, and entering a stable, placed the child in the stall, and the ox and the ass adored Him. Then was fulfilled that which was said by Isaiah the prophet, saying: The ox knoweth his owner, and the ass his master's crib. The very animals, therefore, the ox and the ass, having Him in their midst, incessantly adored Him. Then was fulfilled that which was said by Abacuc the prophet, saying: Between two animals thou art made manifest. In the same place Joseph remained with Mary three days.
Pseudo-Matthew makes sure to include the ox and the ass, too, which to this day figure prominently in several Christmas carols.
Chapters 18 and 19 have the infant Jesus taming wild animals because he is, he says, “perfect.” But Chapter 20 is one that’s gotten into our traditions in song:
CHAP. 20.-- And it came to pass on the third day of their journey, while they were walking, that the blessed Mary was fatigued by the excessive heat of the sun in the desert; and seeing a palm tree, she said to Joseph: Let me rest a little under the shade of this tree. Joseph therefore made haste, and led her to the palm, and made her come down from her beast. And as the blessed Mary was sitting there, she looked up to the foliage of the palm, and saw it full of fruit, and said to Joseph: I wish it were possible to get some of the fruit of this palm. And Joseph said to her: I wonder that thou sayest this, when thou seest how high the palm tree is; and that thou thinkest of eating of its fruit. I am thinking more of the want of water, because the skins are now empty, and we have none wherewith to refresh ourselves and our cattle. Then the child Jesus, with a joyful countenance, reposing in the bosom of His mother, said to the palm: O tree, bend thy branches, and refresh my mother with thy fruit. And immediately at these words the palm bent its top down to the very feet of the blessed Mary; and they gathered from it fruit, with which they were all refreshed. And after they had gathered all its fruit, it remained bent down, waiting the order to rise from Him who bad commanded it to stoop. Then Jesus said to it: Raise thyself, O palm tree, and be strong, and be the companion of my trees, which are in the paradise of my Father; and open from thy roots a vein of water which has been hid in the earth, and let the waters flow, so that we may be satisfied from thee. And it rose up immediately, and at its root there began to come forth a spring of water exceedingly clear and cool and sparkling. And when they saw the spring of water, they rejoiced with great joy, and were satisfied, themselves and all their cattle and their beasts. Wherefore they gave thanks to God.
However, we changed the palm tree to a cherry tree.
The bulk of the stories after that echo the Arabic Infancy Gospel. So, for authority, Pseudo-Matthew recalls Luke, Matthew, the infancy Gospel of James, and the Arabic infancy gospel. Pseudo-Matthew is dated to the fourth or fifth century, with false attribution to having been translated by St. Jerome. So it reaches for authority in every direction The Arabic Infancy Gospel is also dated to the 4th century, which means they both postdate the Protevangelium and Thomas by about 200 years. Long enough to make those two the authorities in the infancy of Jesus, and explain why Pseudo-Matthew and the Arabic gospel are so similar. But these virtually unknown accounts continue to show up in our Christmas traditions.
What do all these versions tell us? That we've been creating an infancy narrative to suit our purposes almost since the original birth. Our current popular narrative is largely a blend of Luke and Matthew, heavy on the Luke: magi and shepherds coming to a manger, angels and a star shining down over the holy family and the first worshippers as they mingle with animals and offer rich gifts to the baby, in a manger (a word we’ve somehow turned into a special barn for all the characters in our nativity sets). That’s pretty much what we’ve been doing since Matthew and Luke gave us their nativity stories. The apocryphal gospels can be said to have started it; and they contributed stories we still tell in song.
Luke’s version provided us with the idea of Xmas songs, and the opportunity to add characters, via the Shepherds plays of medieval England (at least). The favoritism shifted early as the story moved away from apologetics to people the people in the nave (pews didn’t come along for centuries) could identify with.
We never lost characters, of course. Sometimes we even name the magi, but always we think there were three of them (Matthew only identifies three gifts. We've lost the significance of those, though Matthew couldn't be any clearer about it.) Are we closer, or further away, from the truth, then?
That depends on what you mean by "truth." Is the actual birthdate and birthplace of Jesus of Nazareth that important? Should we clean up our manger oriented nativities; remove the camels and the rich visitors and their gifts, maybe even put the whole thing inside a 1st century Palestine peasant's dwelling, rather than some imagined European-style stall, complete with hay and oak beams? Should we erase the "innkeeper" from all the Christmas pageants, because there was no such industry in first century Bethlehem? Call an immediate halt to all those Las Posadas observations? And shouldn't we make all the characters at the manger scenes look Middle Eastern?
Or is that really what Christmas is all about, Charlie Brown?
*Even the Greek histories aren’t history as we think of it. The historian Josephus wrote of the Roman assault on Jerusalem that the blood in the streets came up to the horses’ knees. Everyone pretty much understands that as his attempt to convey the brutality and horror of the attack, History and literature often overlap like that.
