Friday, May 27, 2005

"I can resist anything but temptation."

Which means I cannot resist this, found via Watertiger.

Female Orgasm: Proof of God

Women have orgasms because they can. Women have orgasms because it's the right thing to do.

Women have orgasms because by and large they refuse to launch monstrous ultraviolent illegal soul-deadening wars over oilsucking phallocentric powermad landwhoring BS powergrabs and therefore they fully deserve all the inexplicable otherworldly cosmically infused clitorally energized pleasures they can get.

Did you catch that keyword? That note of strangeness? It was right there, in the word inexplicable. Because apparently, as far as science is concerned and despite the obvious reasons I assert above, no one really seems to know exactly why women have orgasms at all.

Observe, won't you, a new book by a soft-spoken scientist named Dr. Elisabeth Lloyd, from Indiana U, that basically claims there is no justifiable evolutionary need for the female orgasm whatsoever, that it really serves no known biological purpose and that it's becoming, therefore, increasingly obsolete and redundant and more or less unnecessary.


But now witness, argues the book, the heartbreaking number of modern non-ape women who have tragically low or nonexistent sex drives but who still feel absolutely compelled to pop out a nice brood of offspring. The female orgasm, clearly, ain't for procreation. It has no effect on the transport of sperm. It doesn't drive maternal desire. So, if the urge to orgasm has no connection with the urge to procreate, why do women get them at all?

This is the great thing about science. It gets all flabbergasted and confounded and scrunchy when confronted with things it doesn't quite understand and that it can't quite figure out and that don't fit into neat categories, especially if said things are astounding explosive events that make women moan and writhe and gasp and grin and feel their deep inborn prelapsarian connection to just about all of eternity, in the space of about 17 seconds.

There is no room in this mode of science for, you know, mystery. There is no room for the deeply funky or the hotly mystical, the moist divine wild card. This is because stiff little science tends to cram all possibility for a given explanation into the great maw of cold beautiful logic and spits out, sadly and tellingly and almost without fail, the cosmic hunks of mystical possibility as if they were indigestible bones.

That scientific view is, of course, one way to look at it. There is, naturally, another.
You'll have to go read it to find out what that is. Here's a hint: what if it's (gasp!) "spiritual!"

Here's another hint: Julian of Norwich speaks unashamedly (and uncontoversially, at the time) of God as Mother as well as Father, in her "Shewings." Many mystics speak of the mystical union with God in sexual terms. So it's not outside the concept of Western Christianity at all.

And scientists really should be careful about trying to define everything in purely material terms. Especially when they don't otherwise have an answer.

1 comment:

  1. part of female orgasm is a clasping of muscles in the upper region of the vagina, which has the effect of bringing the cervix downward repeatedly--if there's a bit of semen up there, it will increase the likelihood that sperm will make it to the cervix.