Xmas Eve Follies

Food To Leave Out For God On Christmas Eve https://t.co/6fcK4HAgbp pic.twitter.com/P4t7GjdNU4

— The Onion (@TheOnion) December 23, 2021

One last trip to the grocery store.

New Study Finds Humans May Have Some Capacity For Compassion https://t.co/KCXQhbKrbV pic.twitter.com/b0zLF1TDkO

— The Onion (@TheOnion) December 23, 2021

Lawyers almost certainly not included.

Lawyer Explains That Just Because You Accidentally Kill Santa Doesn't Mean You’re Legally Obligated To Take His Place: https://t.co/Y0Zj3KjDr2 pic.twitter.com/zTnvGXjcY2

— The Onion (@TheOnion) December 22, 2021

Who would have standing to bring the wrongful death suit? Opinions differ, since it would be a case of first impression.