Because we all really should be Charlie Brown before we grow up. It would be a life lesson; or something.
“Valentine’s Day is about expressing your unique heartfelt feelings for your special loved one,” blogger Elizabeth Esther told Fox News host Elisabeth Hasselbeck. “To just robotically hand out, ‘Here’s your Valentine, here’s your Valentine.’ Like, what are we? It totally removes the meaning, the special memory for the kids.”
I remember buying boxes of Valentines: they were simple cards, usually in a box of 30 or so, which you distributed to everyone in the classroom, without fear or favor (oh, maybe you tried to favor one person). But it was pretty much "Here's your Valentine, here's your Valentine." I mean, who in elementary school has "unique heartfelt feelings for your special loved one"?
As Charlie Pierce says:
Imagine the mind that thinks this way. Imagine the mind that thinks, hey, this is a viewpoint worth airing on national television.
These really are the mole people.